Tagged: $100-$200, afford, average, balanced, birthday, Birthdays, bought, buys, cost, costs, daughter, expensive, fifteen, gift, Gifts, Holidays, husband, Kids, limitations, oughta, price, put, request, rich, sixteen, son, spend, watching, x-box, year
This topic contains 13 replies, has 9 voices, and was last updated by pattiewrites 5 years, 4 months ago.
December 15, 2008 at 6:08 pm #190114
I’ve been watching my husband and the gifts he buys his kids and I can’t believe how much he is willing to spend.
After having bought an X-box ($300-400) for his fifteen year old son (the request for which came by way of “it’s my birthday, I oughta get what I want.”) his son is now asking for another $100-$200 gift.
Of course all this has to be balanced out by getting his sixteen year old daughter gifts of the same price.
Is this what birthday’s and holidays have become?
We are not rich, though I don’t think my husband knows this.
Do any of you, whether you can afford the expensive gift or not, put limitations on the costs of kids’ gifts?December 15, 2008 at 8:11 pm #1019361
I save about 1000$ throughout the whole year to set aside for Chiristmas. This includes gifts for both sides of the family, food, christmas tree etc. I don’t spend more then this and shop ahead of time as much as I can. I don’t know if this will help with this year but why not try something like this next year? Sit down with your husband and tell him that you would like to set up a Christmas budget for next year and what would be included in this budget and have both of you agree to it. Then make all the kids aware of it as well, so they know that they are limited to what they can get next year. Good luck.December 15, 2008 at 9:36 pm #1019369
Thanks… it certainly sounds like a good idea to agree upon an amount ahead of time. I’ll see what my husband says.
Thanks again.December 16, 2008 at 5:33 am #1019421
It would only be fair to spend the same amount on the other child, but I would never spend that much to begin with. My bestfriend was pretty irriated last year when her parents spent 3 times as much on her youngest brother, who still lives at home, than they did on she and her little sister. There is a way to have balance without excess. And I don’t know as I’d give any gift if the request was so rude!December 16, 2008 at 1:47 pm #1019437
I’m happy to see I’m not the only one thrown off by the amount of money being spent.
I understand to a degree to need to keep things relatively equal, but there seems to be something so calculated in the way the kids really tally up everything.
Maybe it’s because I really don’t remember having checked this type of thing when I was a kid. We didn’t count the number of gifts under the tree to assure we all had the same number of gifts, etc.
As for the rude request, it’s becoming an increasingly popular trend. Last year his request came with an angry “I’m good, I deserve it.”
Thanks for your input.
I probably wouldn’t mind the expensive gifts so much if they were received with a little more appreciation rather than the growing sense of entitlement.December 16, 2008 at 5:47 pm #1019471
It does get expensive as they get older. One year we got my step dd a playstation 2 (when they first came out). Another year we got her an electric guitar. They were big gifts and all she got. We told her we have to set limits, but did want to get her what she wanted most. On those years, she had one gift under the tree, but she didn’t care because it was what she wanted most. It’s an amount of money that we spend on each child, not a number of presents under the tree. That seems impossible!December 16, 2008 at 6:16 pm #1019472
as long as they have everything that they NEED as far as love, healthy food ,plenty of attention at home , a place to call home because of the feeling they have when they are at home not the things in the home.I really do think it is fine to buy what ever you want and spend as much money as you want on whomever you want .In the long run these things are just things. But the needs should be met first.December 16, 2008 at 7:03 pm #1019474
My in-laws spend a ton more money on there daughter than they do/did the boys. There is 13 years difference, but it still irritates my dh. The boys father and mother divorced & the boys father has passed away of leukemia and there mom remarried (hope you followed that). They are in foreclosure and will have to move in Jan. they complain about money all the time but have enough to spend 200$ on there daughter for Christmas and she has name brand clothes, cell phone, etc. I just can’t believe the amount of money they spend on cars, clothes, eating out, etc. & they are in foreclosure! My dh and I are downsizing in everything we can so we don’t have to worry about our house, they have cut my dh’s hours at work way down:( If I hear my in-laws complain about money again I’m going to scream. Sorry about the vent……but anyway my mom spends a TON on us at Christmas. She has a Christmas savings account that she saves in during the year and then that is what she uses for Christmas presents. I thinks it is kind of like what Aiden&Alejandros Mommy does. My dh and I usually use his bonus he gets in Dec for some Christmas gifts & a home improvement project, but this year it is going in our savings just in case my dh gets laid off or his hours get cut even more. Try to agree to a limit for gifts according to what you think is appropriate or can afford before the holiday season.December 16, 2008 at 10:56 pm #1019493
Tracey with 6
with so amny kids we have a budget to stick to, it’s easier witht he little kids, they are alot cheaper and you can buy more tof thebig stuff that looks good for less, teh older ones get one special thing and maybe a couple of little things, and by the time they are old enought o understand the christmas secret they are old enought to understand budgeting too, oh and “”ços I deserve it would not fly around here !December 19, 2008 at 12:57 am #1019653
I have never had more of a humbug feeling as I do this year. Am I reading correctly when one person responded with children get more expensive as they get older. Bah Humbug. When I was a child, there were always gifts to be MADE and family time. I have gone back to my roots where I can. My SS and SD will be the proud owner of a homemade magician’s cape (for SS) and a winter princess cloak (for SD), with a few little things to go along with it. We are losing sight of a very important beginning of Christmas. A man apparently once existed, that would make toys for children. My parents helped me make gifts for people when I was growing up, and I hope to instill the same value in my new family. We have become far too exorbitant giving in to the “demands” of what children want. What children need is a roof over their heads, a solid family life, and good values. I cherish homemade children’s gifts that I get. Some of my most valuable family memories were the things we DID, not what we got. I am all for a cap on money being spent. I would rather spend a $100 on fabric to make people homemade quilts/blankies/capes, etc., knowing full well, they will be highly cherished, for truly is the thought and not the dollar amount that counts.
PS I truly love the Spirit of Christmas, I sure miss it………..December 19, 2008 at 1:54 pm #1019675
I agree 100%. I wish we could go back to that time when the little things mattered; when the time you put into a gift mattered more than the money. Didn’t we use to cherish things a bit more back then? Didn’t we treasure our gifts a little more? (I feel so old saying all this) Now the value of a gift seems to last only a few weeks before they are asking for something else.December 19, 2008 at 3:59 pm #1019687
My mom has 7 other siblings. We get together with my aunt and her family every year (because she lives in state yet) and we MAKE gifts for each other. It is something I find fun doing. It makes you think, and it comes from the heart. And it is always exciting seeing what everyone thought to make every year. My hubby hunts, so they all look forward to getting deer jerky and such. (They usually request it. :bouncing: )
On the note of spending so much money. On my dad’s side, with him and his 2 siblings it is like a contest of who can buy the better present. At Thanksgiving my Grandma yelled at them all and told them she didn’t want to see expensive presents this year because it was getting out of hand.
Dh has 4 other siblings, and his parents set aside about $100 for each child. If they want to get a more expensive gift, then it goes to all the kids, even if they don’t live at home anymore.December 19, 2008 at 5:19 pm #1019698
[quote=Tracey with 6], oh and “”ços I deserve it would not fly around here ![/quote]
Hmmm… seeing how my husband had not responded to that at all, I thought I was the only one who thought it inappropriate.December 19, 2008 at 5:24 pm #1019699
It’s normal for kids to want things like video games, but feeling entitled and not being grateful, is not ok! They need to be taught to appreciate what they do get, whether the gift is small or large and expensive.
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