Are Your Trust Issues Holding You Back?


After a divorce it is natural to have a few trust issues. The person you put all of your trust in betrayed you and hurt you deeply. It is difficult to open yourself up to the possibility of that kind of pain again. You don’t want to feel vulnerable, and understandably so. Nobody expects you to rush into anything, so give yourself some time to deal with these trust issues now, so that they don’t continue to hold you back in the future.

I’ve had a fair number of bad men in my life, as a result it has been very difficult for me to trust them from the time I was about nine years old. I’ve put up walls to keep myself from getting hurt again. To others I appear untouchable, like I have all the self-confidence in the world, when the truth is, there are times when I feel like a little nine year old girl trapped inside a much older woman’s body. I still fear men, and perhaps have an even deeper fear of them because of my divorce. I’ve been burned enough times to know that it doesn’t feel very good, so I’ve made the decision to put up even more walls and shut all men out of my life. While for the time being I am comfortable with this decision, my family seems to think that someday I may decide to let them back in, so I better start dealing with these trust issues in the meantime.

There are a lot of bad men out there, but you have to make a conscious decision that you won’t allow them into your life. Nobody can hurt you without your permission. You know your value, and no man has the right to challenge that. One man’s opinion of you does not diminish who you are. Your worth should never be in question. Distrust stems from the belief that what they are saying might be true. You have to decide that it isn’t. You may have a fear of rejection, most people do at some point in their life, but you have nothing to fear. Rejection is an issue with the other person, not with you. You are only vulnerable if you allow yourself to be. If you know who you are, then nothing can take that away.

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Sarah Williams

About Sarah Williams

I am a single mother to a sweet little 4 year old boy named Logan. I am almost done with my degree in Elementary Education and have loved every second of it. I love writing for Families.com and hope to be able to help other single moms through the difficulties of raising a child on your own.

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