I’ll never forget the doctor’s visit where I sat across from my son’s pediatrician, describing his congenital cataract. I was very concerned about what it might mean. I had done a lot of research, and knew the possibilities. As I ran one scenario past the doctor, she gave me a blank look. She had absolutely no idea what I was talking about. “Have you heard of that condition?” I asked. Somewhat reluctantly, she admitted she never had. As I mentioned more concerns, she nervously turned her back and got out a notepad. “What were those terms again?” she asked.
It was eye-opening for me. I actually knew more than the pediatrician on this subject? Of course, no pediatrician can know all. I’m not suggesting that she was a poor doctor, inadequately educated, or lacking in skills. But prior to that incident I had the idea that doctors were higher beings who knew and understood everything. Of course that isn’t the case. Doctors are human. With my son Kyle, I had to change pediatricians before my concerns were taken seriously. And that one simple doctor switch brought about referrals and therapies Kyle might never have received if I’d stuck with doctor number one.
It’s very important to find a pediatrician who is knowledgeable and understanding of your child’s special needs, and who is sympathetic with your anxiety over bringing your child in for an examination. The trouble is, it’s unlikely you’ll find the right doctor from a random selection in the phone book. Even a doctor your “friend” uses who is very “nice” might not have experience with your child’s disorder. So you’ve got to do some checking around.
Here are some ways you can find the right doctor for your child:
- Get recommendations. Ask other parents of children with your child’s disorder who their doctors are and whether they’ve had a good experience. Contact a foundation or society associated with the condition, and ask for doctors with specific expertise. Ask your child’s social worker, special education teachers, or parents of classmates what doctors they’ve heard about. Certain names should start to emerge.
- Make a call (or calls) and set up a consultation. Be sure to check with your medical insurance to see whether particular doctors would be covered by your plan, and at what percentage.
At the doctor visit, ask yourself these questions:
- How much experience does this doctor have with my child’s disability? (Don’t be afraid to ask, point blank.) You can also ask about specific medications, symptoms, and therapies, to get a feel for this doctor’s general level of knowledge.
- How friendly is the office environment? Is the doctor rushed, with constant interruptions? Does the staff seem overwhelmed? Is there anything about the office atmosphere that would be difficult for your child, i.e. noise level, etc.?
- How convenient is the office location? If your child needs frequent doctor visits, would you be making long trips on a regular basis? Or, is this doctor’s particular expertise and professionalism worth the travel time?
- Does the doctor seem to be sensitive to your concerns? Does he listen? Make eye contact? Is he kind to you and your child? Is his manner calming? Is he attentive?
- Ask what her typical course of action is with children in your son or daughter’s predicament. Are there certain treatments she recommends? If you selected her as your child’s doctor, what would her first steps be?
- Is the doctor hopeful? Does he have a positive outlook and give you encouragement? Is he confident he can help? Is he someone you could feel comfortable talking to about all the struggles you’re having?
- Ask if she has another patient with the same disorder whose parent would be willing to speak with you. (I did this before, and found it extremely helpful.)
A good pediatrician can be instrumental in improving your son or daughter’s quality of life. It’s important that you find one who is understanding, knowledgeable, and devoted to your child’s care. If you’re unhappy, don’t feel stuck. You have the right—and responsibility—to change doctors if your current one is not meeting your child’s needs.
Kristyn Crow is the author of this blog. Visit her website by clicking here.