What is that delicate coffee-colored ring peeking out from under my notes? Perhaps it is the work of tiny aliens, who tired of all of the work of creating large crop circles have moved on to coffee rings in order to have a better chance at grabbing our attention. After all, how many more of us sit at a desk staring at a screen versus walking though a corn field on a daily basis?
Why do you think I drink coffee? Have you ever seen it happen? Do you think that I’ll grab a cup in the wee hours of the morning as I start work, or occasionally at a social event?
For the former, coffee at the computer seems to be an occupational hazard. It goes hand in hand with the job of being a writer. There are very few writers that I know of who don’t have both coffee rings and at least one cat on their desks. Hmm, coffee rings and cats…cofee rings and cats…you don’t think that the cats..nah, paws don’t have opposable thumbs.
As for the latter, well yes, you might find me with an occasional cup of coffee in my hand at social events. After all, dedicated church members work hard at brewing coffee, and it would be insulting to refuse. Tipping the large carafe and hitting it two, three, okay, nine times to make sure it was actually empty might seem extreme, but I just wanted to let the coffee people know that they fill an important role. That is all. It isn’t like I actually need the coffee or anything. Ha!
And yesterday, when I was innocently judging the quality of the organic pears while next to the free coffee sample table (hey, a good pear must be judged at a distance), a woman came up to me. She had a tiny cup of coffee in her hands. “Hey,” she said. “You have to try the pumpkin spice! It is incredible.” Get thee behind me!
Despite the loaf of bread in her cart, I have no doubt she was a plant. The woman had a sort of Juan Valdez gleam in her eye.