logo

The Global Domain Name (url) Families.com is currently available for acquisition. Please contact by phone at 805-627-1955 or Email for Details

Defining Marriage: What about Polygamy?

If we decide to re-characterize the traditionally and currently accepted legal definition of marriage, where should we draw the line? Should we also include polygamy? Activists say yes.

Forming an opinion on this issue may be simpler if we understand more about it. The simple definition of polygamy is the practice of having multiple spouses. However, this does not clarify the make up of the different types of “poly” relationships.

First of all, do you know what the proper term is for a polygamous relationship that does not involve marriage? It isn’t technically polygamy at all. The correct term is polyamory or a polyamorous relationship.

This term should not be confused with the word polyandry. Polyandrous relationships are unions that include one woman and more than one man. The opposite is polygyny, which obviously means one man with more than one woman.

Whichever dynamic we are referring to within the poly community, the question remains are polygamous relationships good for society? There are several different opinions and as many concerns regarding this issue.

Since polygynous relationships are far more popular, one of the major issues of concern is the predilection for such unions to lead to statutory rape and incest. Girls are often married at very young ages within such communities and not too far down the bloodline in some cases, which raises another set of concerns.

You probably remember a few years back when it made the news that a young girl was beaten unconscious by her own father for running away after deciding she didn’t care for her arranged marriage as the fifteenth wife of her uncle. Thankfully, both men were charged with crimes, the father of child abuse and the uncle of incest.

This type of thing is apparently somewhat common, although there is a group called Tapestry of Polygamy, founded by a woman who left her own polygamous marriage and now rescues other women from unhealthy situations.

Yet, another issue of concern is the availability of eligible women to marry young men. The legalization of polygamy could eventually lead to many young men being left without spouses and families. Young men are even cast out from the community in order to give older men a better selection of young girls to take as wives, as was reported in a recent case regarding the capture of Warren Jeffs, a polygamist group leader who made the FBI’s Ten Most Wanted List. It is rumored that the man had 40 wives of his own and arranged marriages between older men and very young girls, kicking young men to the curb.

It is widely recognized that married men tend to be less reckless and begin to settle down after marriage. In this ever more turbulent world we live in, with gang violence and terrorism at all time highs, do we really wish to leave young men without the support and responsibilities of marriage, looking for something else to cling to?

While many consider these situations anecdotal, and attempt to neutralize the issues of child abuse, statutory rape, incest, and unequal populations as slippery slope arguments, these concerns should be given careful consideration.

We must also consider the implications of legalizing gay marriage under the shaky privacy, choice, and equal protection arguments presented since the very same arguments are also used regarding the legalization of polygamy and other alternative lifestyles that may be less than healthy for our society.

If there is an equal rights argument, and I’ve yet to see an effective one, others who engage in alternative living arrangements will demand those same rights using the same arguments. Polygamy is just one of many “alternatives” that people are currently seeking to have accepted by law.

My personal opinion is that we should protect marriage under its current definition as a long held tradition that benefits families and society, and stop trying to force every other possible lovestyle into that legal definition.