Were your parents big spenders? Or were they savers? Did your parents ever talk about money to you? Do they talk about money to you now? What about your in-laws’ spending habits? Are they different from the ones you grew up with? Does your spouse have the same money traits as his parents? Do you?
Often money is a taboo subject in a parent child relationship. Many parents are not comfortable discussing the finances with their children. This is truer in a family where there is tension surrounding the money issues. If spouses do not openly communicate with each other, they are less likely to discuss it with their children.
Even if money issues are not a family topic, you have been influenced by the way that your parents spent money while you are growing up. If your parents were careful with their money, and limited their spending, you will likely do the same thing. By the same token if your parents were spendthrifts, you are more likely to spend most of your income. Occasionally if your parents were extreme spenders or savers you may swing the opposite direction because you did not like what you saw happen to them.
It is important that as you establish your financial habits and take the time to examine them, that you take into account your family history regarding money. This may open up your eyes to certain spending habits that you can’t seem to explain. It can also make your more aware of the relationship you and your spouse have regarding money.
As you sit down as a couple and make goals you need to pick and choose which habits you are going to take with you. You may choose to save a certain amount each month. You may choose to plan for special trips or occasions. I know one family who saved money throughout the year, but still took very nice vacations. Little things such as how much to spend on birthdays and Christmas should be discussed as well. This will help you reach a financial philosophy that your spouse and you both support and agree on.
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