My husband is a do-it-yourselfer – in fact, he’s such a do-it-yourselfer that we’ve clashed over household projects before to the point of building up resentment and irritation with each other. Because he’s a do-it-yourselfer and because we love each – we have come to the following agreements on the projects for both of us.
Setting Boundaries
Too often, do-it-yourselfers start a series of projects and fail to complete them all the way. So one of our standing rules is to finish each project before starting another, unless – as exampled last week – he took apart my recumbent bike and discovered there was a bad pulley that was bent out of shape – the bike is still sitting on his workbench because we are waiting for a part. In the meanwhile, he installed a cat door, repaired some molding around another door and put up new shelves in the garage. Currently, he’s also working on drafting up plans to add a deck to our backyard and extend our porch.
Repairs and Projects
It’s important to determine the difference between a building project and a major repair. My husband can fix most minor plumbing issues, but if we’re talking about digging into a wall or into the ground – we hire someone because it’s safer for everyone involved. We’ve also taken to weighing costs of hiring someone versus doing it ourselves versus time before tackling huge projects.
Helping Others versus Finishing Things at Home
Whenever there’s a big project elsewhere, my husband’s friends know they can call him and he’ll be glad to pitch in. At one point, though, projects at home would fall to the bottom rung while he was helping others out. So now, he takes into account that by doing the above beforehand, most of his home based projects are wrapped up before diving into a huge project elsewhere.
Our solution isn’t perfect, but it certainly saves us both a lot of grief and aggravation. He enjoys fixing things, building things and improving things. I enjoy not having the house torn up or messy on a regular basis – we’ve discovered that these are the solutions that help us.
Is your husband a do-it-yourselfer?
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