Most of you have probably heard terms such as “mama’s boy” and “daddy’s girl”. It is believed, and often very true, that girls are more responsive and bonded with their fathers and boys are closer to their mothers.
Noting that in a normal family setting with loving and caring parents, I often see the pattern of boys hanging on to their mommies and girls with daddies wrapped around their fingers, I began to wonder what impact this has on choosing a mate.
Do we subconsciously look for mates that resemble the characteristics and personalities of our parents? Are females attracted to men who remind them of their fathers? Do men look for women with the traits of their mothers?
To some extent I believe that they do. Children grow up and observe and learn about the characteristics of a family through their own family. Therefore their ideas about husbands and wives and mothers and fathers comes from observing how their own family functions.
In some cases this can be bad and in some cases this can be good.
I believe that girls who grow up with a gentleman fathers that romance and help out their wives tend to look for these same characteristics in mates. They expect that their partner should do the same. Those girls who grow up with television watching fathers while mom does all the work, often also end up with the same type of mate. Again they tend to have the idea that that way of life is acceptable.
The same goes for men. Boys who grow up with mothers who cater to the family also expect their wives to cater to the family.
So do we pattern our mates and relationships after our parents? I think that in many cases we do. Unfortunately in return that means that some vicious cycles are never broken.