Sometimes it can be difficult to discern whether your toddler’s bed time requests for things like a drink or a trip to the potty are legitimate or whether they are attempts to push bed time later into the evening. If the requests are for real, of course you do not want your child to go thirsty and of course you want to support him in the process of learning how to use the potty. On the other hand, if he is stalling, you want to send a clear message that such behavior is not appropriate.
If you are anything like me, by the time your toddler’s bed time comes around you are ready for a break. Dylan has for the most part given up napping and operates at full throttle pretty much all day long. By eight o’clock I am tired, and I am ready for a break. My patience is also at its lowest level. Lately, Dylan has been stretching bed time into an hours long affair and stretching my patience very thin.
We begin our bed time preparations around seven, right after we eat dinner. A little before eight, I remind Dylan that it is almost time for bed. If he asks for a drink, I give him some milk or water. I also ask him if he needs a diaper change. He usually tells me that he is dry, only to inform me ten minutes later (at bed time) that his diaper or pull up is wet and he needs to be changed. Once we are in bed, he wiggles around a lot and talks and talks and talks. He also likes to sneak toys into bed and plays with them to keep himself awake.
Tonight, after another drawn out bed time during which I fell asleep for about an hour only to wake up feeling quite frustrated, I read a little about toddlers and delay tactics at bed time. Here are a few tips that I may implement in order to get our bed time routine back on track. In regards to the potty, I plan to work a final trip to the potty into our routine right before bed – no more asking if he needs a diaper change. Toddlers are smart, and they know that you are serious about showing them that you respect their needs for all things related to potty training. They know that all they need to do to get you to pause the bed time routine is to utter the p-word. However, if you just took your toddler to the potty before bed, you can tell him that he already used the potty and that it is too soon to go again. Be sure to reassure him that if he uses his diaper or training pants, it is okay. This sends a message that while potty training is important, so is going to bed at a regular time. I will also make sure that he has had enough to eat and drink close enough to bed time so that I can deny his requests for those things without feeling like I am depriving him of something that he needs.
Photo by Jade on morguefile.com.