I know that I am running the risk of lecturing some brick walls here, but take it from someone who knows and who has definitely been there—as single parents, it is important that we don’t let ourselves take on too much! I’m serious. I know it seems a little silly to be trying to tell the very people who get used to running around with heapingly full plates to take it easy; and I’m not really giving you permission to let everything drop and NOT do all the tasks, obligations, and responsibilities that come with a single parent family—I’m just providing a word of caution about taking on too much at one time and getting bogged down, overwhelmed, and exhausted.
The only reason I feel like I can “lecture” about this is that I am the QUEEN of over-positive time-management. In other words, I have definitely learned from my own mistakes. I want so badly to be able to do all those things I think a “good parent” does—help out at school, take care of my kids and household; as well as be the type of business owner and worker who doesn’t use parenthood as an excuse. This is often the perfect recipe for letting me get in way over my head in terms of tasks and obligations. I can remember times when my kids were younger that I was coaching two sports teams, volunteering in three classrooms, and working to build a business! Finally, I had to admit that there was no way I could live a life that wasn’t influenced and affected by my single parent status. I had to learn how to say “no,” simplify, and admit that we just might be “that kind of family” when it came to being able to do everything and be everywhere.
By figuring out what my priorities were (my kids, our family, health, happiness), I was able to learn how to let go and NOT take on things that didn’t really add to our quality of life. After all, what was I trying to prove (and to whom?) If you are starting to feel stressed and exhausted, it might be worth your time to ask yourself how much is coming from “elsewhere” and how much of it is due to personal choices that you are making? Are you taking on too much? Are you leading yourself down the path to single parent overload and exhaustion?
Also: It Takes Courage to Get Involved
How Realistic Are Your Expectations?