It can be a controversial topic at times, because of course children’s literal needs must come first before all else. Because they are dependent on us, we must give selflessly and ensure that they are well loved and well cared for. However, sometimes parents go too far. This discussion is not about anything perverted, but about how some parents allow their love for their children to get in the way of showing their love for their spouses.
It may seem wrong for a spouse to become jealous over the attention paid to children, but there are times when the other partner dotes on the children to the peril of the marriage. I adore my husband, but my first thoughts often go to my children. However, when there isn’t necessarily a need at issue, we can put our spouses first at times. I would never have my children do without for the sake of my spouse or myself (and neither would he), but on the other hand, it is good for children to learn that parents also have needs.
What brought this to mind was some of the displays I saw at school for Valentine’s Day. One mother gushed over how excited her child would be to see the wondrous surprises that would soon be delivered to his classroom. If I had to guess, I’d say that she spent well over $100.00 on stuffed critters, treats, and balloons. A teacher commented, “If you’re doing this much for your son, I can only imagine what’s in store for your husband!” The woman’s face fell, and she admitted that she hadn’t even planned anything for her spouse.
I would imagine that her husband ended up feeling very left out if she didn’t do something to change this situation before the end of the day. I’m all for doing things that make children feel special, but I don’t think we have to overdo it to the point that we forget about our spouses in the process.
What do you think?
Other articles that may be of interest:
Parents: Birthdays Are For Us, Too
Undermining Your Spouse with the Kids