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Friday Fitness Funnies: Ready, Set, Laugh!

Good morning and welcome to Friday! Can it really be Friday already? Where did the week go? Why do my legs hurt? Is it good that I can feel them this morning? How was your week? Are you ready to exercise your funny bone? I hope so! It’s been quite a while since we hosted our Friday Fitness Funnies and I thought it was a good time to bring them back as I could use the laugh!

Fair warning: the rest of this blog isn’t supposed to be taken seriously.

Funny, Ha! Ha!

Some of the best advice my daughter ever gave me:

If you eat chocolate and no one sees, then it doesn’t count as junk food right?

If you have water with the chocolate, it washes the bad the stuff out of it, right?

Baked goods don’t have fat in them. The heat melts all of it out.

Silverware

If you lick the bowl after you make the cake, does it count? If you break something up, does it break up all the calories before they get inside? The cacao bean is a vegetable, so chocolate is a vegetable? What about sugar? It can come from beets and that’s a plant, so chocolate and sugar are healthy, right?

Exercise Helps You Relax

If you power through 30 push-ups before bed, you’ll sleep really well after you faint.

If you are having trouble catching your breath, run a mile, you’ll find out what out of breath really feels like.

Society is supposed to be against cruel and unusual punishment, yet everywhere you go, you see someone jogging.

Fitness is Sexist

Sexism abounds in fitness. If your husband and you do the exact same workout and eat the exact same diet, he’ll lose weight faster. Not even passing the ERA would help here.

You can get fitness rage if you hit the rowing machine at your gym. Your heart will race, your muscles will tense and no matter how hard you are rowing, you don’t get anywhere. It sounds a lot like rush hour, doesn’t it?

Kid Fitness

Kids are always exercising. Mine can’t stop pushing her luck, what about yours?

Have a great Friday and don’t forget, laughter burns calories too!

More Humor:

10 Things Pulling My Face Has Taught Me

Friday Fitness Funnies – These Excuses Don’t Fly

10 Reasons to Be Thankful for Fitness

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This entry was posted in Humor and tagged , , , , by Heather Long. Bookmark the permalink.

About Heather Long

Heather Long is 35 years old and currently lives in Wylie, Texas. She has been a freelance writer for six years. Her husband and she met while working together at America Online over ten years ago. They have a beautiful daughter who just turned five years old. She is learning to read and preparing for kindergarten in the fall. An author of more than 300 articles and 500+ web copy pieces, Heather has also written three books as a ghostwriter. Empty Canoe Publishing accepted a novel of her own. A former horse breeder, Heather used to get most of her exercise outside. In late 2004, early 2005 Heather started studying fitness full time in order to get herself back into shape. Heather worked with a personal trainer for six months and works out regularly. She enjoys shaking up her routine and checking out new exercises. Her current favorites are the treadmill (she walks up to 90 minutes daily) and doing yoga for stretching. She also performs strength training two to three times a week. Her goals include performing in a marathon such as the Walk for Breast Cancer Awareness or Team in Training for Lymphoma research. She enjoys sharing her knowledge and experience through the fitness and marriage blogs.