You don’t have to be a professional to give a friend or loved one a massage!
- Use different strokes: stroking using the whole hand, kneading, firm strokes with the thumb or ball of the hand, and feathery fingertip touches.
- Do what feels good to you; it will usually feel good to someone else, too.
- Don’t give a massage when you’re feeling angry or upset — your emotional state can leave your partner feeling equally distressed.
- Warm your hands up! Cold hands can be an unexpected or unpleasant shock to your partner.
- Warm up the oil or lotion. Don’t apply it cold to your partner’s skin; warm it in your own hands first. Too much lubricant will leave you sliding all over the place, but too little will create uncomfortable friction. The more you practice, the better you’ll be at getting the right amount.
- Think about flow. Use your whole body, not just your hands and arms. Lean into long strokes; the more fluid your movements, the more relaxing your massage will be. With practice, you will develop a movement rhythm.
- Think about your breathing. Breathing is just another part of your body’s movement and flow. Try exhaling on a long stroke, then inhaling on the return. If that doesn’t feel “right” — try the opposite! With practice, you will develop a breathing rhythm.
- Vary the pressure. Keep your touch light over bony areas, but you can use a firmer pressure over muscles. Listen to your partner — if they say it’s too hard, lighten your pressure! A massage isn’t fun if it doesn’t feel good.
- Vary the speed. In general, a slow massage is relaxing. Faster movements are invigorating.
- Find a friend or loved one to practice on. Take turns giving and receiving massages — you will learn what feels good to you, and what feels good to others.