Valentine’s Day is the day for letting the one you love, know how you feel about them. But it shouldn’t just be on Valentine’s Day. My husband and I have been married for more than two thirds of our lives. Yes, we married young – both under 21. In all that time there has not been a day when he has not told me he loved me and I have not told him I loved him.
Sure, we show it by our actions and the things we do, but it’s always nice to hear the words. That’s one way of keeping the happily ever after alive in marriage.
If we have a problem we don’t keep it to ourselves and bottle it up but talk it out.Sometimes it may result in argument but that doesn’t matter. At least it’s out in the open not smoldering away inside, causing resentment. If we do argue, I don’t bad mouth him to friends and neither does he do it. We each believe our first loyalty is to each other and some things should stay within marriage and not be bandied about outside.
We support each other in whatever we are doing. My husband has always been a huge support and encourager with my writing. I encouraged him when he was at work about how valuable and conscientious he was in his job, and now he’s retired in the things he takes on.
Before he retired, some women whose husbands were retired, used to look at me askance when I said I was looking forward to him retiring. It wasn’t only because I knew we’d be moving. We enjoy spending time together.
That doesn’t mean we do everything together. Often I spend a lot of the day in my study writing. He will be in the garden but we come together at lunch and then later in the afternoon and evenings.
Sometimes we take ourselves off to the beach or a picnic or to the movies or shopping. Yes, he comes shopping with me and is a great help, especially when clothes shopping. He tells me honestly what looks good and what doesn’t. He will often pick something off the rack that I haven’t noticed. Many times I end up buying what he’s suggested.
Some weeks ago while he was sitting outside the change rooms a woman commented, ‘you’re lucky to have your husband patiently waiting. Mine won’t even come shopping with me.’ And I turned around and told her ‘I always knew my husband is one in a million.’
When we are out walking, shopping or whatever, we are usually hand in hand and we never leave each other without a kiss goodbye – even if only going for a short time and then another kiss hello.
We support each by praying and reading the bible together, not always as often as we intend, due to various commitments. Over the years we have run kids’ clubs or taught Sunday school or involved in puppet groups and bible study together.
Outside of the Lord, my husband is the one I turn to for support, help, encouragement, as well as when I need to talk things over or just need to let off steam about something. And I know that I am the same for him.
When our children were young, it was never a case of the children playing us off against each other but ‘We’ll talk it over.’ Or ‘What did Dad say?’ and he would ask ‘What did Mum say?’ We were united, which is something our children remember about their childhood.
After the Lord, my husband has always come first in my life and me in his. No, he’s not perfect. Neither am I. We both have faults but they are ones we can live with about each other.
We’ve been through some tough times together. But the good part is it has always been, together. In the words of the Shania Twain song he’s ‘still the one.’ After all this time he’s still my valentine and I know I am his.
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