Attachment Parenting-Traditions

I was just an average child, born to my parents in the average way but, I was an emotional child and traditions were a big deal for me. I still hold strong to some of the most important traditions of my childhood, and I never plan to let go of many traditions I value the most. My Thanksgiving dinner will Always Include the dishes I remember on the first Thanksgiving I can remember. It’s fine if Thanksgiving dinner is at someone elses home and they have different dishes. I have actually added a few I picked up from other people along the way to my menu. The important thing for me is, “The Turkey!”

Every family has their own traditions, their own faith and their own way of living. When our children were placed at the age of one and five-years-old we had no history together. Our daughter was old enough to tell us her memories, her stories and share her feelings. We were lucky our daughter was a talking, and outgoing. It was clear very early that she was aware her life here was different but, too young to put into words the way she was feelings. As parents it was our job to help her define the things that were different, about our house and our family. The most important thing was to be sure her past was also validated, and her new life was not about replacing her past.

Maybe because I was that over sensitive child who loved tradition it was easier for me to understand some of the things I might do and say to help our daughter feel like she was a part of our family. I am sort of goofy when it comes to special occasions, certain holidays and Disneyland.

We hadn’t planned it from the beginning but as things have turned out we noticed there is an interesting establishment of security that comes from traditions. It happened by complete accident and my selfish love of Disneyland that this year will be our fourth four-day top of the line visit to Disneyland, of course followed up with dropping daddy at the air port . Then two weeks visiting Uncle John, Uncle Jamie, Aunt Jennifer and Grandpa with all the cosines you can imagine in a resort community in Southern California! This year both children are making plans for what they want to do, and how much fun they want to have.

Thrid Christmas I noticed this year during the Holidays, our third together, that our daughter hasstarted to talk about our family traditions, the decorations that go on a certain shelf, or the color of lights mommy likes on her doll tree. My daughter was in charge of telling us this past year, what the traditions were and which were important to her. It seems right and logical that it would take three years for a tradition to be actually learned. The first year is about doing it, the second about repeating and third is about traditions.

Point Special Needs and Adoption-Related Terms:
A | B | C | D | E-F | G-H-I | J-K-L | M | N-O | P | Q-R | S | T-U-V-W-X-Y-Z

For more information about parenting special needs children you might want to visit the Families.com Special Needs Blog and the Mental Health Blog. Or visit my personal website.

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