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Play with Your Food

I think, as a mother trying to teach her kids manners, that I’m supposed to say, “Don’t play with your food.” But I’d be a hypocrite, because some of my best tricks for making the kids smile have to do with playing with food. So put your good manners aside and try these to bring some fun to the dinner table.

The Barfing Tomato

Yeah, I know. I feel crass just writing “The Barfing Tomato,” but you have to try this before you judge me. Next time you have a cherry tomato on your salad, sacrifice the little dude by cutting a mouth with a knife by making a slit about halfway through the tomato. Then poke eyes with the tines of a fork.

Hold the tomato up by squeezing it just slightly with your thumb and forefinger at the corners of the mouth. Now have your tomato say (make your voice high and whiny): “Hi, I’m Timmy the Tomato, and I don’t feel so good….” Now squeeze. The insides of the tomato will come shooting out of the mouth and if you’re lucky, out of the eyeballs, too.

After your kids pick their jaws up off their plates because they can’t believe Mom or Dad just did something like that, they’ll have a good laugh. Be prepared for your kids to beg you to do the tomato trick whenever guests come over. I just feign ignorance.

Solid Juice

This will make a great April Fool’s joke, but why wait? Make some gelatin and pour it into clear plastic cups. When it’s almost set, put a straw in each cup and then let it set completely. Set the “juice” out at dinner and then try not to giggle. The first person who tries to drink this juice is in a for a solid surprise.

Happy Nuggets

Dress up your kid’s chicken nuggets, Tater Tots or other likely suspects with little ketchup faces. Put ketchup in a squeeze tube (or if you don’t have one, a plastic bag with a corner snipped off) and draw little faces on the food. Your kids won’t know whether to eat the nuggets or make friends with them.