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Positive Steps to Confront Stereotypes

In recent blogs I talked about anti-immigrant feeling in America today and whether it will have an unintended impact on our adopted children. I was thinking primarily of our Asian and Latino children, but a third-grader from Ethiopia was recently taunted in my neighborhood and told to go back to her country. In some parts of the U.S. the immigrant African population may be larger than the African-American population, so possibly more and more people will assume that African-heritage children are immigrants as well. And some of them are—Haiti and Liberia have been native countries of significant numbers of adopted children.

I then talked about facing stereotypes and presenting positive views. I promised to present some positive ways to foster an appreciation of other people.

In one positive image of family diversity, National Adoption Day today received front-page coverage in our major metropolitan newspaper, and therefore on the home page of my web browser. Adoption may yet come to seem normal as Americans gain greater awareness of it. Hopefully, the coverage may lead someone to think about being a foster care parent or a respite care parent.

I would hope that, whatever attitudes adults hold about immigration, they would recognize that children, adopted or not, do not make the decision to immigrate. Unfortunately, some adults do vent their anger at children, and as I’ve mentioned above, sometimes young people do hateful acts when their parents give negative messages about a group of people rather than considering people as individuals.

Some communities, congregations, and colleges sponsor gatherings for the purpose of exploring feelings about race in a supportive setting, where a bit of discomfort is expected but everyone has agreed to be there and to observe some ground rules set forth by the program and a trained facilitator. Some groups use a specific book as a starting point.

I found such a diversity group by looking carefully through our city’s website. There is an individual who coordinates programs such as the above, and also a radio show about diversity. Our community has been largely white historically (save for a large population of Japanese farmers, most of whom did not return to their land after their internment during World War Two). We now boast the zip code with the highest immigration rate in the state, with immigrants from every continent, as well as a growing percentage of African-Americans and Latinos.

There are also classes at our community college which are interdisciplinary courses (say, English literature and sociology) focusing on race, and courses on the history and culture of various American subgroups through the American Studies program.

Below are some links I have found to programs encouraging adults to get to know each other and to discuss diversity. Even if the program described is not near you, it can give you an idea of what such programs offer.

We have to help ourselves before we can help our children. (My next blog will discuss strategies for helping children with these issues.)

Click here to learn about conversations about race in the Twin Cities area.

The United Church of Christ/Congregationalists sponsors The Sacred Conversation.

I also recommend two books on the subject:

–Courageous Conversations about Race: a Field Guide to Achieving Equality in Schools can be purchased here, as can a facilitator’s guide.

–The World Cafe: Shaping Our Futures Through Conversations That Matter

This link has clips from a documentary about two men with the same name—one an African-American who traces his family history to a certain Southern plantation—and finds a white man of the same name, a descendant of the plantation slaveowner. The basic decency of both men shows through despite some touchy conversations about topics such as reparations. Also shown are clips from panelists of various ethnicities discussing the movie.

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About Pam Connell

Pam Connell is a mother of three by both birth and adoption. She has worked in education, child care, social services, ministry and journalism. She resides near Seattle with her husband Charles and their three children. Pam is currently primarily a Stay-at-Home-Mom to Patrick, age 8, who was born to her; Meg, age 6, and Regina, age 3, who are biological half-sisters adopted from Korea. She also teaches preschoolers twice a week and does some writing. Her activities include volunteer work at school, church, Cub Scouts and a local Birth to Three Early Intervention Program. Her hobbies include reading, writing, travel, camping, walking in the woods, swimming and scrapbooking. Pam is a graduate of Seattle University and Gonzaga University. Her fields of study included journalism, religious education/pastoral ministry, political science and management. She served as a writer and editor of the college weekly newspaper and has been Program Coordinator of a Family Resource Center and Family Literacy Program, Volunteer Coordinator at a church, Religion Teacher, Preschool Teacher, Youth Ministry Coordinator, Camp Counselor and Nanny. Pam is an avid reader and continuing student in the areas of education, child development, adoption and public policy. She is eager to share her experiences as a mother by birth and by international adoption, as a mother of three kids of different learning styles and personalities, as a mother of kids of different races, and most of all as a mom of three wonderful kids!