‘You’ve got to have something to hold on to, to keep your marriage together in the tough times.’ That’s what someone said recently when we were talking about marriage. Because the reality is no marriage no matter how good is going to run smoothly all the time.
It might be minor irritations that build up, it might be sickness or just a blah feeling that makes one of you respond differently and snap when you normally wouldn’t. It might be a major catastrophe that comes into your lives. Marriages can suffer when this happens, or it can bind the man and woman closer together.
The woman, who made the comment about needing something to hold onto, has been married close to twenty years. The something to hold onto she was talking about is faith and I agree that’s important. Faith in God and the promises you made before God is a good starting point for holding on when the going gets tough.
Friendship and common interests are two other important factors. When the dizzy first flush of romantic love has settled and you are down to the reality of everyday life, you need to be friends with your spouse and share some common interests. You need to enjoy being together.
On Wednesday, Mick and I spent the day together. Although he is retired and home every day often we are not together all the time because he out in the garden or working on things and I am in my study. But Wednesday in an effort to perk him up, we went out for the day. It was nothing strenuous – just a drive and lunch out further down the coast but it was a lovely day because we were together.
As the miles slid past, the conversation flowed as easily as the river that we passed and covered a wide range of topics with a lot of laughter. That’s important in a marriage.