As parents and especially mothers it seems like we are constantly giving. From the time that our first children are born out lives are devoted to caring for our children. But sometimes we need to take care of ourselves first. One of the ten things that you will find the parents doing in a happy family is making sure that they are taking care of themselves.
I was talking to my sister who commented that her baby recently started waking up more frequently during the night. My sister of course was getting less sleep and as a result was much grumpier in the morning when getting her older kids ready for school. She commented that her lack of sleep was affecting everyone. It is true. When parents do not get enough rest everyone suffers. It is so much harder to be patient when your two-year-old is crying or your nine-year-old is clamoring for your attention and won’t be quiet if you haven’t gotten enough sleep the night before. So take the time to ensure that you get enough rest, eat well, and if possible slip a little exercise in.
It is also important that parents take time together. Research has shown that children usually realize when everything is not all right between their parents. Marital discord affects everyone in the family. One of the greatest ways to ensure your marriage remains happy is to spend time together. It is so easy to get caught up in the day-to-day cycle of life: running children, cleaning the house, and of course going to work, that your relationship with your spouse gets neglected. Take time each night to reconnect. My husband and I set aside one night a week as date night. Usually this consists of us watching a movie or playing games after our kids are in bed, but once a month we hire a babysitter and get out of the house together. It does wonders for our relationship.
You also need to take some time for yourself every day. It doesn’t have to be a long time to make a difference. I love to read. So when I sit down for breakfast or lunch I pull out a book and read for 15-20 minutes, sometimes longer if I can squeeze it in. Although it isn’t long the time spent doing something I enjoy fortifies me for the rest of the day. I feel better because I have done something that I enjoy.
So remember the next time you feel guilty about slipping into a bubble bath or reading a few pages in a novel that in order to have a happy family that it is important that you take care of yourself as well as your children. And if it has been a while since you have taken time for yourself just do it. You’ll feel better and your happiness will be catching.
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