Many married couples feel that the next step in their relationship should be a baby. Not long after a couple marries, the public starts questioning about when they will be having children. The couple then feels like they are supposed to be parents. While being a parent is a wonderful experience it is not for everyone. There are moments in a couple’s marriage that a baby is not the right fit.
A few articles ago, Courtney wrote about why she did not have children. I truly feel that it takes a lot of strength and courage for a woman to announce that she simply is not ready for a baby. Many women feel that it is their duty to have a baby and they do so out of obligation.
I have children and I love being a mother. However, I never imagined the stress that having a baby can put on a marriage. The ideal marriage for a baby is strong and shared equally by the husband and the wife.
After a baby is born (especially if it is a colicky one) a couple can experience stress and emotional roller coasters. A husband may begin to feel left out and undesired by his wife. She is spending all of her time and effort on the baby. She may no longer fill the role of a sexy woman but instead of a caregiver and mother.
It is also very easy for the wife to feel that she is caring more than her weight in the relationship. This is especially true if the husband is not a supportive partner. In some cases, the woman’s life changes completely while it seems that the man experiences fewer changes. The wife may become jealous that her husband can still get out and take part in his “pre-baby” life while she is at home taking care of the infant. If the woman is the primary care giver and taking care of all of the nightly feedings, tiredness and postpartum syndrome may sneak in quickly.
Having a baby is something that a couple should agree upon and plan. While a baby can be a wonderful surprise, it works best when both mates are prepared for being a parent.
When One Of You Wants Anohter Baby