It is a lovely fantasy to imagine our children growing up with the same friends while we, as the parents, stay friends with those children’s parents. In reality, however, our children may go through different stages and phases and choose different peers and friends to share their journey and we parents change too. There may be some people with whom we trundle along the entire parenting path together, but for most of us, our friends will probably change as our children grow up and our overall lives change.
Keep in mind that while your children are busy growing and developing, your life is changing too. You may change careers, go from being married to divorced (or vice versa), move to a new area, go through a health crisis, etc. Things are constantly changing and while some friends may stick with you through it all, your social needs will change and this is completely normal. As parents, our support system is so important to how we experience parenthood, but it is unreasonable to expect that the support system will always look exactly the same. We need it to evolve just as we will evolve.
When my children were very young, all of my every-day friends were those parents who were involved with the same cooperative preschool. Over the years, however, I went to work full time, started my own business, went through a divorce, and moved to an entirely different state. My socialization and support needs changed. I also needed different sorts of mentors as my children went through different stages. While I have kept many of the friends I have made along the way, my life is constantly changing and expanding to include new friends and peers. As my children change, so too do I and as my children’s friends change, mine do too!
See Also: Who Can You Count On?
Is it Time to Update Your Support System?