Dads are Important, Too!

A few months ago, a book was released that emphasized the important role that dads have. It is possible that the book may have influenced some parents to take a moment and think about the importance of dads and whether society might need to update its idea of what dads can do. Let me begin by clearly stating that I think that both dads and moms are very important to their children. Each can have a very strong influence. Whether that influence is positive or negative depends largely on the individual choices each parent makes. A book called Do Fathers … Continue reading

The Subjective Experience of Being a Father

What does it mean to be a father? How do I “be” a father? What does a father “do?” What is important is what being a father means to you as a father. To me, with a part Norwegian heritage, something more permanent than becoming a Marine, I like to tease and joke with my children. I get the better part of the relationship, though. They have a funnier sense of humor than I do. But they know their father cares and interacts with them, and sometimes they even laugh at my jokes and teasing. Of course being a father … Continue reading

Getting Kids to Exercise

I grew up with parents who normally did not exercise, unless their employment demanded it. This was due to how they were raised, and what their society taught them. This had negative effects on their health later on, one parent being depressed, and going from doctor to doctor without being helped in any major way, the other being an extreme puzzle for the doctors, who finally acknowledged they didn’t know what to do with him. Both my biological parents died from heart attacks and strokes, one at the early age of 56. Going to school, and socializing with people who … Continue reading

The Subjective Experience of Being a Father

What does it mean to be a father? How do I “be” a father? What does a father “do?” What does being a dad mean to you? Like my Scandinavian ancestors and relatives, I like to tease and joke with my children. I get the better part of the relationship, though. They have a funnier sense of humor than I do. But they know their father cares and interacts with them, and sometimes they even laugh at my jokes and teasing. Of course being a father is more than just horsing around. We go to work daily, if we can, … Continue reading

Lemon Pepper In My Eye

When I tried to go to sleep last night, my hungriest child requested food. Because I grew up being hungry all the time, even though my parents weren’t direly poverty-stricken, I let him. An interesting dialogue resulted: “Dad, there’s nothing to eat!” “You’ve got chicken in one crockpot and beef in the other. Just put some lemon pepper on it. That makes everything taste good…” Suddenly, I sense someone standing over me. I roll over and find myself looking up, eyeball to bag of lemon pepper. Small bits of lemon flavoring and pepper fall off the bag, going into my … Continue reading

Fathers & Food

Most of us have some memories of our mothers making and serving delicious foods, some every day, some just on the holidays. I grew up a very hungry person, well able to consume large pizzas in a single sitting. So I have compassion for hungry children. My wife was in an exciting, entertaining, and not a fun car accident, and while she recovers, I get to cook most of the household foods. There are some downsides to that. While I like quality, tasty foods, I get so hungry that don’t care, as long as it is healthy enough, rather than … Continue reading

It’s a Girl!

After wondering what it would be like to be a parent, I finally got to hold a little pink girl in my arms, my first child. We thought she was going to be a boy, and it took two more children to persuade me to give up guessing what gender my unborn children were going to have. With all the drama that happened getting from California to Utah, and then attending to the birth of my first child at home (Tristi was in labor twenty hours) I was glad to have a child, but not in the position to feel … Continue reading

My Adventure with Our First Birth

I lost my job ten days before I married Tristi, and I had to scramble to get any kind of employment. Part of that employment, when Tristi became pregnant with our daughter, Caryn , was a part-time job with the Army National Guard. This had its ins and outs. For one thing, I was not paid very much, making about $8.00 an hour in spite of my bachelor’s degree. The Guard was good to me in other ways, one of them being willing to train me as an administrative clerk in a camp near Dublin, California. This made things exciting … Continue reading

Looking For My Father

When I was twenty-seven, I decided to come to Utah to find my biological father. It wasn’t difficult to locate him, and he seemed genuinely glad to be reunited with me. It was a strange, bittersweet experience. As I met his other children, I got to be around people who looked like me and had similar talents and intellects for once. As my father and I interacted, I slowly began to understand why my parents were not able to stay together. The problems went far beyond incompatibility. They were incapable of being there for each other. They each had severe … Continue reading

Husbands and Home Births

Shortly before I began dating Tristi, I read Arthur Janov’s book, “Imprints: The Lifelong Effects of the Birth Experience,”and began to understand why having children at home, without drugs, might be helpful to them and their mother. I didn’t necessarily agree with everything Arthur had to say, but his book did open my mind to the possibility that many children don’t need the full hospital interventions that often happen in America. According to Dr. Janov, babies born without drugs, whether at home or not, tend to be less irritable, and grow up with fewer psychological issues. When I asked Tristi … Continue reading