12 Oct 2006 10:38 AM

Random thoughts for today

I was sitting here thinking about what my ds said to me the other day. He said "Mom, do you always need to put make-up on ?" I told him that I don't always have to, but that I like to. I asked him why was he asking. He told me" Well, Mom it makes you look all fancy ." I just thought it was one of the cutest things that he said to me. When I think about the things that he says I smile, and if I am having a very emotional day, I will cry. Yes, I am a big ole sap.

Right now I am a sahm. I have been a working mom several times. I am just now feeling like I need to do more with my life, I want to be more fulfilled. At times, I feel guilty for feeling this way. Like I should be thankful that I have my 3 boys and my wonderful dh. But, I also realize that I do not do a whole lot for myself. I don't get my hair cut by anyone but me. I don't get my nails done often, maybe once a year or so. I have never taken a "vacation" by myself or for that matter just dh and I. I just know that eventually our boys will be growing up and moving out and I want to have some sort of job or hobby that can and will occupy my time. I guess I just want to be ready for that time. It seems as though time is just flying. I remember having my first son like it was yesterday.   Maybe I am just expecting my life to be more fulfiling than it could be?!  (thought to be continued another day)

My boys school wants me to be involved in the PTA AGAIN  . I have been the PTA president before and it was difficult, but boy was it rewarding. I told them that I would think about it all. I am just concerned because it is time consuming, and I have a 2 year old. He can be a handful at time (as most 2 y.o. are) the good thing is I CAN take him with me to school and have him stay with me wherever I go. 

I keep thinking that I also need to do something about my weight, I am not getting any younger. I want to be a healthy weight that I can be confident at. I like myself, don't get me wrong. I just am not happy with the way that my body looks, I know that it can look alot better. I just think that I would start walking daily, but then all my fears/negative thoughts come in my mind, and I never do the walking thing. I wonder if I am the only one that has these stupid thoughts that keep me from doing good things for me. I hope that if someone is readign this and has gone through it and oversome it, would let me know how they did it.

Going outside with baby for a while~ have a great day!        

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