margaretp's commentsComments On: Everything Articles Blogs Journals Photos created by: Everyonemargaretp The Guilt of Sexual Assault07 Nov 2007 06:38 PM I wonder if it's more that they have turned shame into guilt. Shame keeps people feeling bad about themselves internally- meaning "I'm Bad." Guilt however says, "I have done something bad." There is more closure when we say we are guilty of something. We can say, something bad happened, I am guilty of this part of it, and move on or repent. Christ was a master at turning shame into guilt because he knew that shame was a "trap" and guilt had a "door." Shame is a very damaging emotion,Yet is considered a very aristocratic virtue as well. Street Drugs and Mental Health04 Nov 2007 07:24 PM I think if parents were able to put down their alcohol, zanax perscriptions, and all the legal drugs that they are on, the teenager might understand what "drug free" really means. Most teenagers now just head to their parents medicine cabinets for a quick high. Dealing with a Narcissistic Mother16 Aug 2007 05:57 PM You are nice to offer your counsel. I have had about $30,000 worth of therapy on the subject through H Hazelton. They labeled her NPD and suggested I cut ties with her. I recently moved away from her at the suggestion of my present therapist. She too told me there was very little I could do but to totally remove her from my life. The anger stems from my mother not "owning" her own behavior and getting away with it abuse. Since I moved, my mother has tried to put me on a new guilt trip. It's the CONSISTENCY that I can't handle. If she tries to call me, the phone company is ready to deal with her. Thanks again for your imput. Dealing with a Narcissistic Mother15 Aug 2007 09:47 PM I've known people with other "disorders," like bi-polar disorder, ADD, etc. Although they had some behavioral difficulties I've never seen any of them want to cause harm to their children. The Narcissistic mother makes every attempt to destroy potential happiness for her children. This is why I can't understand the "disorder" category because of the intent. The intent is to destroy good. It is so clear and obvious. These websites are full of people getting abused, feeling powerless, because there is no justice going on. They are getting away with it because it's a "behavior." Well, It's the behavior from hell. They ruin all the lives around them and still remain calm. No one seems to be stopping these people from their daily destuction. Even if they were to end up in therapy, they'd lie to the therapist, so what good would that do? I am at a real loss when it comes to the Narcissist. I don't feel sorry for them. They know exactly what they are perpetrating. Isn't the impulsiveness to destroy other people enough to warrent an active response by our society? They are no different than the other abusers we identify in our culture. Why are they getting away with it? Dealing with a Narcissistic Mother22 Jul 2007 02:35 PM I will behave myself now. I know this is a family forum. Thank you for listening. My mother has been under psychiatric care for over 25 years. She goes, not to learn and work on herself, but to pick up a perscription for zanax. Technically speaking, she is a drug addict. Between her alcoholism, drug addiction, narcissism and beyond, who would be able to know her plight. Therapy has not improved her, only made her worse. She lies to her psychiatrist. Any educated psychiatrist knows you don't give zanax to someone who drinks too much. The combination can be deadly. She is very wealthy so she has never had to work. EVERYTHING is about her. When my father was dying of melanoma in 2005, she got after hospice for not paying her more attention. These nice hospice workers were so confused by my mothers behavior. They had to keep reminding her that they were there at the house to tend to my father. She was jealous of the attention that my father was getting as he was dying. THAT is a blueblooded Narcissist. Even 9-11 was about her. She remarked, "I'm not going to be able to go to the airport anymore." It goes on. Thank you for your comments and I look forward to reading your article on the "Aging Narcissist." They do get worse with age. They are sick people who hurt others and need to be locked up in a mental institution. Dealing with a Narcissistic Mother21 Jul 2007 11:31 PM I applaud your ability to view the Narcissist as having a "disorder." Where do we draw the line in their ability to abuse their children? If they didn't have feelings they wouldn't become so reactive about criticism. They must secretly know that they are hurting someone else's. I hold them responsible for their actions like any other human being. Because they mothered a child does not give them the freedom to abuse the child. It is illegal and violates the Constitution in this country. Emotional abuse is just as bad as physical abuse. It's just more deceptive. What is the definition of evil if not deceit, trickery,lies, lack of empathy,lack of humility,chaos and total disregard for another human being. This is more than a disorder. I've been told by a minister, now a Bishop, to stay away from my mother. What does that tell you? Dealing with a Narcissistic Mother21 Jul 2007 01:01 PM Dr. Scott Peck studied possesstion at the end of his career. He indicated that "possessed" people know there is something wrong with them. There is an internal struggle of the will.- The struggle being between the pure, good, God given spirit with an evil intruder. There is no internal struggle with the Narcissist. They are evil incarnate. Something has already won. This is why psychotherapy doesn't work on these people. The "truth" has to come from within. Secondly, Narcissists are not nurturers so they don't belong mothering anything. If you watch the Discovery Channel you'll see Apes, Bears, Fish, Bugs, Lions, etc., all protecting and nurturing their young. Not so with the Narcissist Mother. She is a breed of her own, and reflects nothing of what God instilled in his creatures. Sorry to be so blunt, but I have spent many years making excuses for my mother because she was my mother. If she fails to struggle with her evil ways, I have no other impression but that she is not from God. Dealing with a Narcissistic Mother03 Jul 2007 05:34 PM Narcissistic mothers will attack and kill your spirit. Run for your life! I am 44 years old and have just discovered that her illness has a name. They lack total empathy and humility. These "mothers" need to be locked up in prison with the rest of the psychopaths. They have criminal intent. They cause pain and fear. They are pure evil. That is why the people around them fall apart and the Narcissistist is still standing. Next time you get assaulted by one of these "entities" call 911 instead. |
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