Pam Connell's comments

Free Scrapbooking Software - Blog Entry

23 Jan 2007 01:34 AM

thanks Julie, this looks great!

Caring for the Poor - Blog Entry

21 Jan 2007 11:10 PM

Ed, you did a lot of good that day--by letting your children see this firsthand you tripled the caring!

Alcohol Consumption and Pregnancy - Blog Entry

21 Jan 2007 10:49 PM

Sara--It is indeed hard to determine how much is too much. But that's not because "some women may find it hard to determine what is abuse", but because there are still so many unknowns about infant development despite all we know.

In fact, medical professionals believe that as little as two drinks at the wrong time can damage a developing baby. Conversely, it is possible that someone who drinks too much could "get lucky" and have it not be at a critical point in brain development, or have their baby's brain be very resilient perhaps.

Alcohol exposure is thought to have a more lasting effect on the baby's brain than cocaine. Also, much brain development occurs in the third trimester, so while many medications which doctors avoid prescribing in the first trimester are given in the third, alcohol continues to be harmful throughout. For this reason, a baby who was exposed to alcohol only in the third trimester likely will not have the facial characteristics of full-blown Fetal Alcohol Syndrome since the face is already formed, but may have many of the brain problems. (As Anna noted above, doctors are abandoning the use of "FAS" and "Fetal Alcohol Effect" (FAE formerly referred to alcohol-related brain damage without physical characteristics) because damage is on a spectrum and hard to define as major or minor, which FAS vs. FAE implied.

I know that it was once common to have alcohol during pregnancy, but it is some learning problems, poor short-term memory and birth defects previously unassociated to alcohol are now being linked.

Our pediatrician works at an FAS clinic. She said that it is common for IQ to be about 20 points lower in people exposed to heavy alcohol even if it was not enough alcohol to show physical symptoms. So maybe many of us would be even smarter if previous generations had avoided alcohol altogether!

Advantages of Closed Adoption? - Blog Entry

21 Jan 2007 10:23 PM

I read yesterday that "confidential adoption" is now preferred to "closed adoption" because "closed" implies that there will never be any adoption-related issues--the adoption is "finished" and no longer an issue. I've used the term "closed adoption" many times, but I can see their point. (however, some of these same articles on "positive adoption language" urge us to say "was adopted" instead of "is adopted" to show that adoption is a one-time event rather than an identifying characteristic, so the logic gets a little muddy, although I can see the point of that too.)

Understanding and Strengthening Language Comprehension - Blog Entry

21 Jan 2007 08:24 PM

Thanks for writing this. Our 4 year old qualified for the school district's birth to three early intervention toddler program based on receptive language issues (I think there were expressive as well) as well as motor skills. She improved to the point where she doesn't qualify for the preschool program at the district but I am still watching out for auditory processing, distractibility, focus etc. Sometimes it's hard to tell if it's a receptive language issue or an impulse-control or attention issue, or if I just don't expect as much of her as the other three. (She did tell me once, after hearing her older sister give me that saucy "I can't HEAR you" singsong--which was NOT effective or tolerated with us!--"But, but, I don't want to hear you!"

Interplanetary Parenting - Blog Entry

21 Jan 2007 08:15 PM

Apparently there is a common remark among my son's fellow third-graders: "Well, you know what they say: kids are from Earth, parents are from Pluto!"

Getting a Baby vs. Parenting a Child - Blog Entry

21 Jan 2007 08:05 PM

Thanks Artcraft. I've enjoyed reading a bit about your boys in your comments.

One of the Best Gifts You Can Give Your Child: a Lifebook - Blog Entry

21 Jan 2007 06:53 PM

Thanks rsbg, thank you for reading! Do I remember from one of your comments on another blog that you're in the adoption process currently? I'd love to hear your story!-Pam

"Exporting" Children? - Blog Entry

18 Jan 2007 12:56 PM

Thanks to both of you. It is one thing to have people question me, but it does amaze me that they'll do it in front of the kids.

The IRS Adoption Tax Credit and Special Needs Adoption Information - Blog Entry

18 Jan 2007 12:44 PM

The adoption tax credit is also available to those who adopt internationally (they will need to show proof of the costs of adoption). Ongoing medical coverage and subsidies and generally not available for children adopted internationally.

For more information on international adoption, see the adoption blog at families.com and click on "international adoption".