Pam Connell's comments

Choosing Whether and How to Adopt Transracially--Our Decision - Blog Entry

16 Jan 2007 06:25 PM

Thanks so much for reading Andrea. I'm glad the closeness between parent and child shows. To us I think I think being parent and child comes to feel so natural that I don't really notice staring--until, like I wrote in the "Where is her Mother" blog, someone smiles and chats with us for a while, then wonders where her mother is and if she's lost. :-)

I think there was some logic to our decisions about where to adopt given the role models available in our particular little part of the Pacific Northwest at the time. I guess none of us can ever be quite sure how much of a role in our decisions may have been played by subconscious biases or undue worry what others might think. I just try now to make sure the kids have exposure to individuals from all ethnic heritages, not just theirs and ours.

American Children Are Being Adopted in Foreign Lands - Blog Entry

16 Jan 2007 04:34 PM

I just want to say that I have learned so much from reading your blogs and from all those who comment on them, as well as from an African-American and Caucasian family I've met recently.

Andrea I just wrote a blog on how we made our decision to adopt internationally if you are interested. I'm a little nervous to have you read it but I really respect the comments you've made on these blogs and am curious to hear what you and others have to say. The blog is called "Choosing Whether and How to Adopt Transracially: Our Decision".

Also, kcg, I just posted a review of a book "Inside Transracial Adoption which may interest you. Blessings on your journey and please keep us posted!-Pam

Adoption Transitions #9 Toddler Adoption - Blog Entry

15 Jan 2007 03:08 AM

This is a great blog Anna. In the case of international adoption, many parents who expected to receive a baby find that their child is a toddler by the time of placement due to delays in getting the visa or similar problems.

The Let's Talk Blog Top Ten - Reasons to Have a Small Sibling Age Gap - Blog Entry

14 Jan 2007 09:21 PM

One thing that I think is hard is having one child with a large gap while others are close. Of course I know many "surprise caboose" children who adore and are adored by older siblings, so any spread can work. But my experience was that I was five years older than my two sisters, who were close. I was always a bit jealous of their close relationship. I never had a sibling in high school or college at the same time I was, etc.

Of course, my dh is 20 months older than his younger brother and only 1 year apart in school--they were competitive and fought all the time. So I was saying, "let's not have kids too far apart" and he was saying "not too close"!

I once heard Dr. T. Berry Brazelton say that there are so many pros and cons each way for the siblings, do what works best for you as parents and don't worry about it.

Traveling to Our Daughter, Part Three: Going Home! - Blog Entry

13 Jan 2007 11:41 PM

Crickett, Thanks for reading. I hope this will spur others to write of their experiences. -Pam

Asking for Help - Blog Entry

13 Jan 2007 06:56 PM

Thanks Anna. Your words mean a lot to me because I've learned so much from reading you, MJ and Ed.

The Family Name - Blog Entry

12 Jan 2007 02:53 PM

I was once treated by an orthopedic surgeon named Crutcher...despite the ominous name he had me off crutches in a couple of months. This has really got me remembering trying to choose my children's names...in fact, I think I feel a blog coming on...stay tuned!

How We Chose the Type of Adoption that was Right for Us - Blog Entry

12 Jan 2007 02:30 AM

Thanks Anna. I've learned a lot by reading yours too (and Ed's and MJ's and others').

An Adoptive Mother's Letter to Her Daughter: Part 3-Rumors and Crutches - Blog Entry

10 Jan 2007 07:04 PM

Anna--this is so well said. I think the way you think about things will help if (probably when) I need to talk with my children about some of these things. Thank you so, so much for sharing this. -Pam

The Fight for Isaiah is Over - Blog Entry

09 Jan 2007 06:33 PM

I'll echo what Patti said--your blogs (and your family!) are amazing! Thanks!