Somewhere in the Strict Zone

time-out-chairTime outs don’t work with my kid.

Sorry, Supernanny.

I understand the method behind the discipline technique and follow the directives explicitly; unfortunately, sitting in a chair and allowing my child to simply think about her poor behavior doesn’t yield positive results.

So, what’s a parent to do?

Ramp up the punishment?

I am by no means a permissive parent, but I’m not a super strict one either.

I’m somewhere in the strict zone hoping not to tip the scales too far in either direction.

However, I am more concerned about entering the overly strict zone.

I don’t want to go there.

According to experts, excessively strict parents exert control over their children via physical or verbal force.  Harsh physical disciple includes grabbing, pulling, slapping and hitting.   Meanwhile, overly strict verbal punishments include screaming, cursing, threatening, and humiliating.

Studies show that 90 percent of parents in the U.S. admit to using some degree of harsh verbal discipline with kids 16 and younger.  The majority of those parents also noted that the discipline method was “usually” effective.

The downside to yelling at your kids all the time is that they become immune to it.  What’s more, if you go ballistic when your child does something wrong, what are your actions teaching him?  Modeling a lack of emotional control is counterproductive and could possibly encourage your son or daughter to follow suit.  So, now you’ve got a child who can’t regulate his emotions effectively and screams, yells, and hits others when he gets frustrated or angry.

Not exactly productive parenting.

Experts say that when it comes to disciplining children balance is key.

In other words, find a way to keep from erupting like Mount Vesuvius when you are upset, but don’t sweep your kid’s bad behavior under the rug either.  Rather, use your authority as a parent to set age appropriate rules; come up with punishments that are not physically or emotionally harmful; and follow through with consequences.

What method of discipline works best in your family?

This entry was posted in Parenting Tips/Techniques and tagged , , by Michele Cheplic. Bookmark the permalink.
Michele Cheplic

About Michele Cheplic

Michele Cheplic was born and raised in Hilo, Hawaii, but now lives in Wisconsin. Michele graduated from the University of Wisconsin-Madison with a degree in Journalism. She spent the next ten years as a television anchor and reporter at various stations throughout the country (from the CBS affiliate in Honolulu to the NBC affiliate in Green Bay). She has won numerous honors including an Emmy Award and multiple Edward R. Murrow awards honoring outstanding achievements in broadcast journalism. In addition, she has received awards from the Aircraft Owners and Pilots Association for her reports on air travel and the Wisconsin Education Association Council for her stories on education. Michele has since left television to concentrate on being a mom and freelance writer.

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