Starling's comments

Non-Muslim Woman: Should You Marry a Muslim Man? - Blog Entry

10 Oct 2007 06:26 AM

You described it so well. Yes, he's intense, yes, he's wildly exotic and yes he's tall, dark and handsome. He's also the man who taught me so much about Islam at a time I was researching it that I fell in love with him whilst falling in love with Islam. There are many things about Catholicism and Christianity that make sense to me more now than they did before I reverted to Islam. The whole idea of "submission" of the wife could not be portrayed as beautiful for me, now matter how hard anyone tried. But in Islam, I WANT to be there for my husband in a submissive yet independent way and I can't explain that to anyone except someone who is muslim or married to one and happily so. I love my beloved with all my heart and I am thankful that making the relationship work is about more than the love - that part comes easily. I like that there's a give and take, that we analyise and scrutinise everything together until we reach some consensus, and when that means I back down, it isn't always easy but I do it UNDERSTANDING why I want to and wanting to. And when he has to back down (which many people who out of unfortunate ignorance would say never happens) he does so graciously and so beautifully yet in such a perfectly gentlemanly way, that it makes me love him more. I wish there were more good stories out there about muslim marriages, either to reverts or to people of the book. I guess the old adage that bad news travels fast is true. I almost didn't marry him because so many people gave me "the bad news". So far, I'm glad I didn't listen. Happy people seem to have less time to share about their joys, scared it will "jinx" them, than the unhappy ones who are all too quick to vent. Perhaps we are at fault for exuding jealousy, I don't know, but somehow, we should encourage our sisters and our brothers married to muslim and non-muslim spouses to share their happy stories. There should be a spot in cyberspace for GOOD news. The comments above are all a taste of that good news and as a newcomer to the site I'm really glad I stopped by! Thank you.