There have been many times throughout my life that I have found myself feeling stagnant. I had goals and I was working hard, but I didn’t feel like it was moving forward in my life. There wasn’t anything I could do to speed up the process, which caused me to feel completely helpless to get my life exactly where I wanted it to be.
This feeling of stagnation can often cause depression, especially when you can’t do anything about it. I felt like I was doing everything I could to move forward after my divorce, but without my education I was unable to truly support my son on my own. I wanted more than anything for us to be able to be on our own, but it just wasn’t feasible until I had finished school. At the time I still had over two years left of school and the thought of staying with my parents for that long was unsettling for me. I had always taken pride in my independence and suddenly I was very dependent on my parents. It was humiliating for me, but I continued to work hard because I knew it was the only way to overcome the situation I was in.
Now that I am so much closer to being done with school I finally feel like there is a light at the end of the tunnel. While I still find myself feeling stuck in a rut every once in a while, I finally feel like I am getting closer to my goal. My divorce definitely threw a wrench in things. It made reaching my goals much more difficult than I ever could have imagined, but the sense of pride I feel at being able to accomplish these things all while being a single parent could never compare to what I would have felt if I hadn’t.