Tag Archives: alone time

Navigating Alone Time

How well do you do on your own without your spouse?  I certainly don’t need Jonathan to look after me, and I could support myself without him, but that’s not what I’m talking about.  What I mean is: if there are times that your spouse is away from home from an extended period of time, how do you feel about it? I’ve never liked living alone.  If I wasn’t married, I would prefer having a roommate to living by myself.  I spent the summer before I got married living on my own, and it was unpleasant.  So when Jon goes … Continue reading →

The Joy of a Quiet House

Most of you know by now that I truly love being a mom and I cannot imagine my life without the noise and chaos that comes with having a family. Still, I think every single parent will be able to commiserate when I say that there is wonderful gift of joy that comes with the occasional quiet and peaceful house too… I don’t often have the house all to myself and even when I THINK I do, there is usually someone waltzing in unexpectedly to put a bit of a damper on my solitude. Of course, I’ve gotten used to … Continue reading →

Can You Live Without Alone Time (At Least for a While)?

I find that when I talk to new parents—whether they are partnered or single parents—one of the first and main topics that come up is how to find time to be alone. Not alone “as a couple” but genuine, all-by-ourselves, no one hanging on us or asking for anything alone time. Well, sometimes it just isn’t possible… One thing that has helped me over the years is realizing that “alone time” is somewhat culturally constructed. Different societies, tribes, and cultures have different ideas about being alone. There are those societies where the children are either strapped to, or attached to … Continue reading →

We Are Entitled to Do Some Things Alone

One of the realities of single parenthood is that we often have our child or children as our constant companions. We eat together, run errands together, and when children are young or during times of stress, our kids will often even camp out in our bedrooms. Even though we parents may want a little alone time, it can be hard to carve out that time and even harder to justify. If we work all day, we may feel absolutely obligated to spend every other spare moment with our child. Alone time is not a crime, however, and we really are … Continue reading →

Dinner Without the Kids and Without the Guilt

I told myself that I deserved to have just one meal that I could enjoy in peace. So when I had the opportunity to eat dinner without Tyler I wasn’t going to alter my plans unless it was an emergency. So when my phone rang as I pulled into the parking lot of the Best Western Hotel in New Orleans to have dinner at the newly remodeled Sassafras Restaurant, I answered said phone with a mixture of panic and annoyance. When I found out that he really didn’t want anything I was relieved. When Tyler passed the phone to his … Continue reading →

Helping Our Kids Let Go of “The Crowd”

Peer pressure, friends, cliques, socialization–it is all a huge part of growing up. Our kids learn a great deal about surviving in the real world from learning how to interact socially as they are growing and developing. But, our children also need a chance to hear their own voices, get away from the crowd, and get in touch with their individuality and figure out who they are when they are NOT part of a big peer group… As parents, we can help our children learn to balance social time with alone time. Of course, some kids just seem to natural … Continue reading →

Tips for Finding More Alone Time

I often hear from and read about couples that simply cannot find alone time for themselves individually, as a couple, or both. With the demands of family, home, work, and outside activities, they are simply exhausted at the end of the day. Here are some tips for making a little self-time or couple-time: Soccer Mom Syndrome Moms and Dads who feel like they spend every spare moment in the car running the kids to and fro, often feel like they have not time for themselves or each other. I’ve been there, done that, and I should have at least one … Continue reading →

“Me” Time

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Sometimes the answers we seek are literally right in front of us. As parents we often talk about not getting enough “me” time. However, there is a way and it’s really quite simple. What you have to do is take out a calendar or day planner and schedule time for yourself. That’s right, make a date with yourself. You’re equally as important as any activity or appointment aren’t you? Nod your head “yes”. I had read on several separate occasions that you should schedule exercise into your day. That you should actually write it down as an appointment. Why not … Continue reading →

What to do With Larger Chunks of Alone Time

Last time I gave you a list of things to do if you had a little extra time for yourself. Here I’ll give you a list of things to do if you have some longer spaces of time. I’m sure you have several ideas already, but maybe this will help broaden your horizons. Read some movie reviews and rent one or two, or go to the movies and watch one there. Then go to the movies forum and write a review, or discuss it with others. I know I suggested reading for the short amount of time, but I am … Continue reading →

What to do With Small Chunks of Alone Time

My last blog had some ways to get alone time, now that you have that time available, what are you supposed to do? Well, what you actually do is all dependent on your likes and dislikes, as well as exactly how much time you have. The number one thing you must do is take that time for yourself. I know it’s hard when you have that extra 15 minutes NOT to do an extra chore around the house, or get a jump on some work you need done, but you must resist that urge. You made this time for you … Continue reading →