Tag Archives: blended families

Meet The Teacher Night

School starts back next week and tonight we are going to meet the teachers. This is always an interesting day for our family. When you have a family that does not match there is usually some explaining to do. With our family we also have to tell the teachers the basics of seizure first aid just in case the boys have a seizure at school. Luckily that has not happened but it is better to be safe and informed than sorry and scared. We always explain to the teachers that the children have been adopted and that they all have … Continue reading →

Preparing to Be a Step-Mother

There are so many ways that a step-mother can prepare for her role in the family. It isn’t often that we wake up one morning and we didn’t have time to prepare, so it is ridiculous to think that there isn’t a way to both mentally and physically prepare for being a step-mother. I’m not talking about going out and getting in shape and fit because you are going to be chasing children around. Not at all. The physical aspect of preparing for your new role as a step-mother involves simply learning a little about the new family before the … Continue reading →

A Step-Mother’s Role

If you are in a blended family, you’ve probably heard the prediction that step-families will be the families of the future. However, over the years our society has painted the step mother out to be this horrible woman who treats her step-children terribly. Think Disney movies and you basically have it. Is this the norm in a typical blended family? Not at all. Most step mothers are seriously committed to making their blended family a success rather than a statistic. With the odds strongly stacked against them from the very start, a step mother often feels ill at ease and … Continue reading →

New to Parents, Not to Parenting

As it is, I am new to the parents blog, but am definitely not new to parenting or to families.com. I’m Nicole Humphrey, and I am the new parents writer and will be dedicated mostly to the topics of blended families and single parenting in this blog. I’m pretty excited to embark on these topics here at families and thought I should take a moment to introduce myself. I am the proud (and somewhat frazzled) mother of five children. Two are mine, three are his – which makes seven of us living our life in a never-ending blender (and a … Continue reading →

Blended and Divorced Families and Major Events—Part Two

I promised when I was writing Part One of this series on getting through major family events when you are part of a blended, divorced, and rearranged modern family that I would write this article providing tips for HOW to actually cope and survive. I do think there are some skills and coping mechanisms that can make it less stressful. Try to remember that you STILL cannot control what other people do or how they react. I know this can be a hard one and I am one of those single parents whose first inclination is try to organize the … Continue reading →

Blended and Divorced Families and Major Events—Part One

For many of us single parents, most of the time we can get away with NOT having to interact with our ex-in-laws or other extended family members on a regular basis. In fact, as the children get older—even parents who have shared custody may find that they rarely have to talk to each other. When major life events come along, however—such as a wedding, funeral, birth of a baby, or (as is my current family situation, graduation)—we are forced to have to figure out how to get along, coordinate and/or detach in order to salvage what sanity we can. I … Continue reading →

Dating when You Both Have Kids–Part Four–Blending Kids of Different Ages

An old friend of mine was starting to date another single parent in the midst of her divorce. She had two little girls that were pre-school age and he had three girls aged 2 to age 7. They were a very active pack when they all got together. When they eventually moved in together, a big part of the adjustment came in just trying to get all the kids to get used to each other. Other single parents who date each other have just the opposite problem–the kids are at such disparate ages that they have a difficult time trying … Continue reading →

Dating when You Both Have Kids–Part Three–Yours, Mine, His, Hers, and Theirs

Families of divorced, separated, re-married, and step families can get incredibly complicated. Often, we get so used to how our families operate that we don’t really see how confusing and complicated it can look to outsiders. Meanwhile, for our children, it can take time for them to adjust to changes and figure out the dynamics and intricacies of various family relations. When mom or dad remarries or partners, there are new dynamics to adjust to, if there are more children who come with those new partners, things get even more complicated. When we start dating another single parent, we have … Continue reading →

Coping with “Us” and “Them”–Part Two

I started writing about how blended and step families can wrestle with an “us” and “them” reality when families and people feel there is a division earlier this morning. Instead of feeling like a cohesive family, it can instead end up with people taking sides and there being “old family” and “new family” camps. I do think there are things the adults can do to help to alleviate this–instead of make it worse: First of all, I think the adults must BE adults. This means not making confidants out of the children or saying hurtful things that will make things … Continue reading →

Coping with “Us” and “Them”–Part One

At my house, it is just me and my children, (and a few pets too), but when my children are with their dad, there is a whole other step-family to contend with–another “parent” and a step-brother too. One of the more painful and constant issues my kids are wrestling with now is the feeling of division a their other house. They don’t feel like one cohesive family and it bothers them. Even though I am not living it first-hand, I am often the one that they want to talk things through with… I must first say that I have not … Continue reading →