Tag Archives: burning

Should Adoptive Parents Search For Their Children’s Birth Parents?

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A Dutch adoptive family recently located their daughter’s Chinese birthparents. Their identity and story was confirmed by DNA testing. It is the first known case of Chinese birthparents being found. The Dutch couple says they were motivated by their daughter’s “persistent interest” in her birthparents to use the media in Chongqing, China to search for her birthparents. There is actually quite a lot of controversy in the adoption community on whether adoptive families should search for their children’s birthparents. Many of us have now seen examples of open adoption—now the norm in U.S. domestic adoptions—in the lives of our friends … Continue reading →

Who really hires from home?

One of my “businesses” is my website which I spend time updating here and there. It’s a resource for working from home, and I plan to sell Ebooks and coaching services. Well, today I decided to go through and find the “legit” businesses and add a work from home job section. Though there are many resources out there, often the links are broken or there are hidden costs. I am trying to go through and weed out the “good” from the “bad.” So I spent today clicking around and trying to find businesses that actually hire. Many people have written … Continue reading →

Meeting Birth Siblings

I’m struck with awe every time I meet a sibling of one of my boys’. When I get ready to meet one for the first time, I expect to see this strong resemblance between them and my child. Though I can usually fish for some similarities, it is so difficult to look at a child who is not a sibling by our immediate family relation and grasp that the child is related by genetics. I have been blessed to get to know both of my youngest son’s half siblings and three out of six of my older son’s birth siblings; … Continue reading →

Adoption Related Music and Songs

During my entire search for my biological mother, I found great comfort in music. In fact, I’ve always taken great comfort in music. Music has a way of making even the worst situations, move you to a place where there is comfort and peace. Lifting your spirit, music encompasses your entire soul. In my search for my biological mother, and the during the subsequent reunion, I found a peace with what I now call, adoption songs. When I was searching for my biological mother, I made my own music tapes of songs that reminded me of my search – now … Continue reading →

The Reunion – A Mother Finally Holds Her Baby Girl

When our eyes locked, it was amazing. It was like an electric energy was coursing through me, and I realized that I was honestly looking at the person who gave me life. If it wasn’t for her, I would not be here today. The thirty or forty feet we had to walk across the baggage claim area, to get to each other seemed like an eternity. While in reality it was only seconds. And just like in the movies, when she got to me everything she was carrying hit the floor and I rushed into her arms and she held … Continue reading →

The Reunion of Mother and Child: How It Began

I shared my search story, and I know I left a lot out. It was a long process, and one I wish to never repeat. The emotions associated with a search are incredible, and not necessarily in a good way. However, there did come a time, when the search was over, that I began to wonder about a possible face-to-face reunion. It was strange, but surreal. I was happy just having contact via letters and emails and the occasional phone call. But after time, I needed more. The phone calls began coming more and more frequently to where my birth … Continue reading →

How Long Does An Adoption Search Take?

Every adoptee beginning a search is hoping that their search will be quick and easy and that there will be no snags. Is this possible? Sometimes. But more often than not, a search takes quite a bit of time and effort until its completion. To be quite honest, there is not any real answer to this question. There is no length or period of time that can be provided to anyone. However, there are several factors that can provide for a quicker more relaxed search. Organization Being as organized as you can during this time, is important. Keeping track of … Continue reading →

Roses and Peaches….Not Really

Sometimes when people look at my search and subsequent reunion, they think that everything was all roses and peaches and that life is perfect. And while to some, it may look that way now, it wasn’t always that way. Even after that initial letter I received from my biological mother, things weren’t always peaches and roses. In fact, we would stay in contact via letters and then not talk for months. It was hard to establish a relationship and connect when we both were so busy with our own lives. We lived hundreds upon hundreds of miles apart, and we’d … Continue reading →

Adoption Poetry: After the Initial Contact

My outlet has always been writing, and because of that, I have accumulated quite the nice possession of original poetry and essays by yours truly. Always very hesitant to share with just anyone, I finally have let that go, and decided to place some of them here. So on this beautiful Monday morning, I thought I’d share just a couple of poems that were written shortly after the first contact that my biological mother and I had with each other. The feelings were so raw, and so unpredictable back then, it’s interesting for me to go back and read them. … Continue reading →

A Glimmer Of Hope

And then on October 28, 1996, my world changed forever. I went out to get the mail, and there amongst bills and ads, was a big white envelope addressed to me. I didn’t recognize the writing on the envelope but it was definitely a personal letter, and a rather thick one at that. I’m not even sure that I made it to the door with my envelope before I had torn into it. Inside the envelope I pulled out another purple envelope, again addressed to me. This one had a big red rubber stamped mark on it that said “Attempted, … Continue reading →