Tag Archives: give and take

Taking Care of the Little Things

It’s amazing how important the little things are in a marriage. Yesterday Mick and I were playing a set of tennis together. We were playing against good two players. Throughout he kept encouraging me with, ‘nice shot’ or ‘good pick up,’ and similar comments. Meanwhile I kept encouraging him as well ‘great serve.’ ‘Well done,’ etc. The result was we both played exceptionally well. That’s the difference a bit of encouragement makes on the court and in marriage. It helps you be better than you really are. Sadly, into his second set his Achilles tendon started to play up as … Continue reading →

M and Ms for Marriage

Yes, Mick and I have been at it again – talking about marriage and this blog. I mentioned I was having trouble coming up with some Ms for my Alphabetical blog and he came up with a beauty or three. Read on to find out what they were. Maturity Marriage needs people to be mature. No, I’m not talking about physical age because young marriages can, and do, work. But mature in their attitude towards marriage and toward their spouse. That can mean not still trying to live like you’re still single even after the wedding ceremony. It can mean … Continue reading →

Marriage Means Adjustments

Being married means making adjustments. It means adapting to living with another person and considering, and where possible accommodating their interests, likes and dislikes as well as your own. This is important in bed as well as in other places. When we first got married Mick said, ‘Why do you want to chat as soon as we get into bed?’ Having talking to a number of women it’s something more than a few of us are guilty of. I suspect it’s because when we get into bed, we start to replay the day in our minds. We’re thinking about what … Continue reading →

Who Controls the Remote?

Who controls the remote in your house? My guess is in most cases it is the man. That’s certainly true in our case, purely because I am a non technical woman who has trouble with machines. So this has been a conscious choice to let Mick take care of it. Some men seem loathe to part with it ever. The way the carry on has to be seen to be believed. I have known women complain they never get to watch a full show because as soon as an advertisement comes on the husband switches the channel. Of course I … Continue reading →

Is It Really Worth It?

Sometimes the way we react to a situation depends on our own outlook on life and especially our outlook about marriage. Let’s face it; some people have some very negative views about marriage. like this one from Katharine Hepburn ‘If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get married.’ On that note, Mick and I were in the supermarket buying tins of tuna that were on special. It was one of those deals where if you buy so many tins the price is reduced. When we got to the checkout, we … Continue reading →

The Poetry of Marriage

Poetry has a certain rhythm or musicality, as I call it, which makes it poetry. A good marriage does too. It has a rhythm of give and take, a certain flow to the way things happen and the things the couple does. Even in the hard times that rhythm of love is there. You don’t always have to be in sync or to rhyme. These days much modern poetry doesn’t rhyme either. But it’s still poetry. The effective images and the rhythm are still there. You may find times when you won’t understand your spouse and why they’ve done something … Continue reading →

Who’s’ Driving the Car and Your Marriage?

When you go out with your spouse on a trip do you share the driving or does one person drive all the time? Sometimes what happens in a car can reflect what is happening in a marriage. Mick and I share the driving when we go on a trip – if he starts, then I will drive later and finish or vice versa. The idea being if one starts to get tired then the other takes over. Similarly if one of us isn’t feeling well, the other person would do more than their share of the driving. I know other … Continue reading →

Do You and Your Spouse Complement Each Other?

Do you complement each other? When we spent the day with another couple recently, Mick and I thought how well they complement each other. They are very different in a lot of ways yet, each one is the same in that they support and complement each other and encourage them in the jobs they are doing. Consequently their marriage works well because they work as a team. What one doesn’t have in the way of skills, the other one supplies. When one is struggling and feeling down their spouse is there to lift them up and love them and encourage … Continue reading →

How to Deal with an Allergy in your Marriage

These days many families seem to have at least one person who has an allergy. So, what difference does it make to a marriage when one partner has an allergy? If you or your spouse has an allergy, you might find the next two blogs helpful. Allergies have been on my mind a lot lately, partly because I recently reviewed a new book about allergy-safe family food and partly because I live with allergies. For years I struggled with pain so that I was unable to function at times. It took a long while before we discovered the cause was … Continue reading →

Not the Key to a Successful Marriage

Today I saw a scary article about a lecture entitled ‘The Keys to a Successful Marriage.’ It appears that an apparently self-appointed religious leader in Melbourne has told men under Islamic law ‘they can force their wives to have sex and hit them if they’re disobedient.’ He also told them there is no such thing as ‘rape’ between a husband and wife. Given that Australia is currently engaged in running a campaign trying to curb incidences of domestic violence, it is horrifying to see a religious leader coming out and advocating something like this. In ‘The Keys to a Successful … Continue reading →