Tag Archives: no

The Magic of “No” Part IV: Honesty

If you haven’t caught up with Parts one, two, and/or three you should do that now. Today is the conclusion to our little story. Onto the telling… The WOMAN woke up that morning and peered into the room housing her cans. She saw the gleaming little eyes of the rats who had taken up permanent residence in her waterlogged little room. She clutched her robe closer to her body; now there was a draft. She thought about going to get one of those cans. She thought about defending herself from the rats with a pushbroom. She thought about carefully avoiding … Continue reading →

The Magic of “No” Part III: The Woman Who Couldn’t

If you missed the beginning of this story you should visit this link to catch yourself up. Today we’ll be looking at the Woman’s perspective in a little story called “The Woman Who Couldn’t.” The WOMAN kept calling the VOLUNTEER but she couldn’t ever actually get the VOLUNTEER into her house to help her move the cans out of the leaky room. While the VOLUNTEER would keep making promises he never kept them. He always had good reasons though… and she could understand. But time went on… and on… and on. Every day the VOLUNTEER had “something come up” and … Continue reading →

The Magic of “No” Part II: The Volunteer Who Couldn’t

Last week I talked about the mystical powers of the word “no.” I talked about the dangers of “yes” (despite the movies to tell you otherwise) and suggested analyzing what really needs to be said “yes” to and what you might want to cut out, truncate, decapitate, or reevaluate to a new position of non-importance and a default response of “no.” I’m going to share a story that I hope will demonstrate the importance of this word from both sides of a story. Today I’m going to explore one perspective in a story called “The Volunteer Who Couldn’t.” There once … Continue reading →

The Power of “No” (Part 1)

Posted on by

Jim Carrey was recently in the charming film “Yes Man.” It’s about a movement to say “yes” to everything. While the film is certainly worth watching (for those old enough for the content), and the overall meaning is positive, there is a definite danger to the word “yes” when it comes to college. One of the best pieces of advice you’ll ever receive is “get involved: early and often.” College is necessarily a transition for most traditional students. You’re moving away from the ever-watchful eye of parental supervision and into a different environment that involves a certain amount of maturity … Continue reading →

How to Say No

As I mentioned earlier, I’m feeling bad about having said no to a few commitments this week. I love my friends, and enjoy helping them, and don’t like to feel like I’m letting them down. But sometimes, you just have to say no. Sometimes you’re over-committed, sometimes it’s just something you don’t want to do, sometimes you just can’t fit it into your schedule. Still, all those reasons don’t necessarily make it any easier to say no — especially when it’s a friend doing the asking. Here are some tips to help make it a little easier to say no. … Continue reading →

Saying No Can Be Good for Your Health (and Sanity)

I hate saying no. It makes me feel bad. It makes me feel guilty. It makes me feel like I’m letting someone down. To the recipient of the no, it’s probably not that big a deal. They find someone else to ask, and maybe that someone else says yes. Or they find out that they didn’t really need help after all, and get it done without help. My schedule is getting a little crazy this week. I’ve had plans for this Friday for a few weeks now, but suddenly I’ve been asked for my time on Thursday and Saturday, too. … Continue reading →

Girls to Women: All Too Soon?

A major British retailer is now selling Pole Dancing kits complete with an instructional DVD and garter. The catch: the market is aimed at 4 and 5-year olds. There is no end of toys and apparel targeted to very young girls that mimic the clothing of much older teenagers and women. While the latter may choose to wear these outfits based on their own minds, little girls of young school age do not have the informed mind of an adult even though they think they know want they want very well! Childhood lasts for a relatively short period in the … Continue reading →

Training Time

Yes, you guessed it, night one with a new puppy and not much sleep happened. So now, having read the advice of experts, we are in the process of trying to train her to get used to her own company at least for some of the time and to sleep in her own basket at night without howling for company. The experience reminded me of when my son was a baby. He was happy to be anywhere, as long as I was in sight but as soon as I tried a playpen or a baby gate between us he protested … Continue reading →

Saying “No” and Meaning It

I began my parenting career back in the early 1990’s when it was very out of fashion to tell children “No”—the advice of the day was to explain things to children, provide alternatives and distractions, but not to be too “negative.” I could never quite get on board with leaving out the world “No.” In the first place, I thought speaking clearly and in short statements to toddlers was the way to go. In the second place, the real world says “No” all the time and we have to learn how to deal with it and have a clear understanding … Continue reading →

Learning To Just Say No

Book Review: No: Why Kids –Of All Ages– Need To Hear It and Ways Parents Can Say It, by Dr. David Walsh Parenting expert and psychologist, Dr. David Walsh of the Institute on Media and the Family, says that parents don’t say the word, “no” enough to their kids. One of the reasons he feels this is true is because of the media. Kids today are bombarded with commercials and as a result they get a bad cause of the “gimmes”. Sadly, a lot of parents will give in and buy their kids whatever they ask for. He calls this … Continue reading →