Tag Archives: time-out

Time Outs for Toddlers

To say I am a firm believer in time outs for toddlers is an understatement. I have tried everything to get my son to behave and listen to what I tell him. He is a very strong-willed, hard-headed, stubborn child. He is full of energy and determination. Consequently, he is always getting into trouble. My son’s most recent reaction to getting into trouble is to smile and come over and hug me. I recently told him, “I don’t want a hug. I want you to listen and to do what you are told.” At that point, he leaned in and … Continue reading →

Shopping with Toddlers

Whether or not you love to shop, going to the store with a toddler in tow is much different from shopping alone or with older kids or adults. Today, I took my toddler to the mall. I survived. I didn’t think I would. At least when I go shopping alone or with an adult or even with a teenager, they walk by themselves without asking to be carried. My son just had to have me carry him and that took a toll on my back. I remember a few years ago when I went shopping with my friend and her … Continue reading →

Do Time Outs Really Work With Toddlers?

Not if you ask Alfie Kohn. The know-it-all… I mean, child behavior expert and author… recently wrote a piece in the New York Times admonishing parents who punish their children for bad behavior AND those who reward their children for good behavior. According to Kohn, parents who reward or punish their children are sending a message that love is dependent on behavior: “Turn up the affection when they’re good, withhold affection when they’re not.” So, no time outs and no gold stars. I guess Kohn just wants us to let our rule-ignoring kids run around hog wild and never suffer … Continue reading →

Time Out!

We’ve no doubt all heard of children being given ‘time out’ at school or in the home for wrong behavior. For a marriage ‘time out’ can be a beneficial time. Of course ‘time out’ doesn’t have to be a negative thing. I’m not talking about ‘time out’ for wrong behavior. I’m thinking more of ‘time out’ away from the family, even if they’re in the same house. Let me explain, Is there a time or place when you and your spouse get to talk without being interrupted by children and other demands? If not, there should be. Why not set … Continue reading →

Teaching Kids to Calm Themselves

I’ll be the first one to admit that I have a love/hate relationship with time-out. I’ve used this technique with Tyler and have experienced my fair share of successes and failures. In the November 2007 issue of Parenting, I read about an alternative to time-out and it sounds like a good idea. Let me share it with you. Basically, the author tells us to re-think time-out by not giving our kids time-outs when they are misbehaving. Instead, we should teach them to take their own time-out when they feel they are getting out of control. This method teaches kids to … Continue reading →

WATCH IT! Help Your Child with Time Management

Do you constantly have to remind your child of the daily schedule? Do you make agreements, like “Fifteen more minutes of TV,” and then deal with a horrible tantrum when the time is up? Does your child need help staying on track with homework? Would you like to help your son or daughter develop a sense of independence and responsibility? Everybody Get In Sync! I recently heard about a private school that was instilling personal accountability and time management in their students. What they did was issue a particular style of wristwatch to each and every child from age four … Continue reading →

Making the Most of a Cooling Down Period

This past weekend, my older teenage daughters and I were sitting and chatting, eating cheese crackers and catching up. I have been delighted to find that when they pass the rockiest of the adolescent years (I surely hope), they do want to hang out occasionally with mom again and my daughters actually ASK me to spend time with them. Okay, that’s the good part. The not-so-great part is that now that they are older, they provide some comment and reflection on how I’ve gone about the business of parenting. This past weekend, the conversation came around to “mom’s cooling down … Continue reading →

Time-Out: What Counts As Quiet Time?

Time-out is one of those disciplinary techniques that never worked for me. In my early days as a mother, I had visions of Tyler going obediently to his room and taking his time-out like a soldier. The reality of the situation is he has never gone to time-out without a struggle. I understand the time-out procedure, in theory, and I believe I have followed the steps correctly but for some reason it never worked for me. Then I read something interesting today. It has always been my understanding that a child’s time starts when they are in the time-out area … Continue reading →

Is Your Method of Discipline Working?

Don’t feel like your method of disciplining is working? Relax, you’re not alone. According to a recent poll, many parents also feel that their method of discipline is not working on their kids. Researchers from Children’s Hospital at Vanderbilt, polled more than 2,000 parents of children between the ages of 2 and 11. They focused on four common discipline techniques: time-out, removing privileges, yelling and spanking. The research appears in the January issue of Clinical Pediatrics. Here’s a few of the highlights from the study: Over 42 % of the parents surveyed reported time-out as their method of discipline. 42% … Continue reading →

8 Weeks To A Well-behaved Child-Week 6, part two

Part two continues. (4) Frequency– punishment works best when it is infrequent, otherwise the child will become immune to its effects. (5) Follow-through– if you issue a warning or threat you must always carry it out. (6) Context– the atmosphere within the family is very important when administering punishment. Your relationship with your child is also important. If the atmosphere is hostile, the punishment will more than likely be taken differently from the way it was intended. The kids are also more likely to consider the punishment as meanness, rejection, etc., if their relationship with the punishing parent is cool … Continue reading →