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29 Sep 2007 06:29 PM

Standing still

We\\\'ve been going through the days. We had immediately painted the room that was his but it turned out to look like Halloween. Our desk is this wood color with black trim. Well, once on the wall, the \\\"wood\\\" color looked orange.  We moved the office stuff in anyway. We\\\'ll have to paint around it. I called in to work tonight. Too weak. Too sad.

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27 Sep 2007 10:15 PM

sadness, frustration

This evening has been hard. I went to Target and there are new babies everywhere. Cruel. I\\\'ve always said that if you can\\\'t be happy for the birth and life of a baby, you don\\\'t deserve one. I believe it to be true. I know more than anyone what a miracle it is to have this happen to someone. It just won\\\'t happen for us. Let\\\'s see. Natural attempts at pregnancy. IUI\\\'s.

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