The holidays are a season of healing. We are encouraged to embrace our fellow man, to share a smile with a sister mother and to beam at the children who are bubbling over with excitement for the decorations and more. Everywhere you go during the holidays there is something to smile about and all of these feelings of good will and kindness are advantageous for you and your partner to resolve issues both large and small.
Healing a Troubled Marriage
Have you and your spouse been experiencing some distance or disagreement in your marriage? Troubled marriages benefit from this time of the year and here are a few steps that you and your spouse can take to resolve your troubles.
- Accept and admit to each other that you have a problem – it doesn’t matter if only one of you thinks there is a problem, if one spouse believes there is a problem then a problem exists and denying it will not make it go away. Denial can actually lead to more problems in the marriage and it takes two of you to fix problems and two of you to make the solution successful
- Don’t Put it Off till After the Holidays – Too often when a couple acknowledges that they have a problem, they put it off and put it off and they miss the window where they are both willing to work on it together
- Seek Professional Support – Marriage counseling can help both of you give your marriage the objectivity and compassion it requires to resolve issues and it can help keep you both on focus when confronting these problems together – aim to end every session on a positive note and begin each session with a goal
- Don’t Eliminate Yourself from the Equation – Too often when we are trying to fix our marriages, we highlight the problems in our spouse and we don’t look at ourselves – remember it takes two of us and it’s important to take responsibility for your own contributions and mistakes in the marriage
- Open Yourself to Learning Something New – Repairing a marriage can be a lot like repairing a broken bone – when a bone breaks and is set – it knits together stronger than before and a marriage can do the same thing – you and your spouse are going to take responsibility for your problems, seek ways to heal the rifts and put your marriage back together – potentially making it stronger than before
If you’re worrying that confronting problems at the holidays can stain your enjoyment of the holidays, recognize that when you are feeling the warmth and the love at this time of the year makes it the perfect time to look positively at healing your marriage, making it stronger and what could be a better present for the two of you?
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