This blog is the fourth in a series discussing the ideal traits that an adoptive parent of a special needs child should have. An adoptive parent must have a willingness, maybe even a fervor, for demanding and getting their children’s health and learning needs met. There is a fine line between coming on too strong and coming on strong enough to achieve the desired purpose. I like to have a goal of doing whatever it takes to get the best available resources for our boys.
I have already related the problems that we had with the public schools and how we were fortunate to find an ideal alternative. In that case, other parents and a teacher advised that we just had to take a very tough stance and stick with it. I was willing to do that but I was going to have to live with that attitude for many years. I was also afraid of how the boys would be accepted there if our family had to have an adversarial relationship with the school. As reported in another blog, I found a much better situation for them.
I have also previously discussed having to fight tooth and nail with the State of Texas to get Isaiah into our household. I was able to convince the people in charge that I was not going to go away and that I was going to be very stubborn. It helped that I had the stated policy of CPS on my side. There are times when you have to “throw down the gloves” to let them know you are serious. (In hockey, the players throw their gloves down on the ice prior to having a fist fight.)
Sometimes, you get what you need once the provider has heard your entire story and is made aware of the hardship that no cooperation might cause. We have Medicaid dental coverage. The nearest provider was at least an hour away. A children’s dental clinic has just been established less than a mile from our house. They did not intend to take Medicaid patients. I inquired a number of times, told them how close we live to their facility, and told them about our boys. We are able to use that clinic today.
Our pediatrician has seen the needs of our children and the hard work that Nancy and I put in to keep them healthy. She bends over backwards to help us. Yesterday, Isaiah was getting sicker by the minute. Many businesses in town were closed or closing because of the weather. Nancy called the office to see if we could get in. The receptionist said that the doctor was leaving the office early. She checked with her and came back to the phone to say that the pediatrician would wait for us if we came in immediately.
I do not like to get mean with people, but I will if necessary to get what our boys need. Fortunately, it usually does not have to go that far. Our Creator does supply all of our needs.
Related Blogs:
Adoptive Parenting Traits, Part 2
Adoptive Parenting Traits, Part 3
Adoptive Parenting Traits, More Part 3