These parents must have been. At least I am going to assume that’s what happened. They were busily trying to get everyone fed, dressed and out the door and at the last minute remembered that they had to write a note on behalf of their child. These are actual excuse notes written to teachers by parents!
Realizing that her son has P.E. today and needed to be excused, one mother wrote the following:
My son is under a doctor’s care and has to miss P.E. today. Please execute him!
Along the same lines: Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.
Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.
Sometimes we all have a little trouble remember the exact date. These moms seemed to have trouble remembering. . .the calendar?
Please ekscuse John from being absent on January 25th, 26th, 27th, 28th, 29th, 30th, 31st, 32nd, and 33rd.
Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday.
Sometimes students miss school due to serious injury. Such is the case with these poor students:
John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.
Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.
Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.
Or perhaps a student is just really ill:
Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his boots leak.
Sally won’t be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral.
Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.
And sometimes. . .well sometimes I’m not quite sure what the parents were thinking. . .
Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.
Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father’s fault.
I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I don’t know what size she wear.
The moral of the story? Make sure you proofread your excuse notes!