I know that being a single parent is hard for both moms and dads who go at it alone. Add to that the lack of child support and it seems to be a losing battle. I am sure there are single parents out there who are very successful and are able to care for their children without financial concern. I wish I were one of them.
I chose not to pursue child support because I knew that with child support would be visitation. I didn’t want the father of my child to have visitation. I made the financial sacrifice in order to do what I believed was best for my son.
I’m pretty sure that if his father was made to pay child support, he would fight tooth and nail for visitation just out of spite. I now refer to him as simply my son’s sperm donor. I dread the day that my son asks me about him.
If my son’s father were to get visitation, I have no idea who he would drop him off with. I know he wouldn’t take care of my son by himself. I know that it would be a situation where my son would be dropped off with someone I don’t know and I can’t allow that to happen.
When I told my son’s father I was pregnant, he was angry and did not take the news well. It was an unplanned pregnancy and he was adamant that I was guilty of entrapment. He threatened me with charges of entrapment when I asked for help.
Due to the fact that my son’s father told me he wanted nothing to do with our son, I’ve left him alone since I got over the initial anger of being told he wouldn’t do anything to help us. I haven’t spoken to him since my son was a baby.
I’ve pursued working from home in order to be with my son. We live with my family due to financial constraints. I am very fortunate to have a family that is willing to help out. I do wish I could do more to financially support us and be able to do things that we are unable to do at this time.
I decided that it is worth the sacrifice now, while my son is young, to spend time with him and watch him grow and help him learn. Later, when he is a little older, I’ll focus more on making money. I know that I have to sacrifice something and right now, it is anything extra because there isn’t money coming in for anything extra.
Being a single mother without child support is very difficult for me. I would love to know how other moms handle the situation and what resources are out there to help them. My resource is my family, to whom I am very grateful.