Bonding With Your Girls

As everyone knows, every child is different. I have twin girls, and although they have been raised in the same house, under the same circumstances they have ended up with very different personalities. It would be impossible for anyone to come up with one foolproof way for all dads to bond with all daughters. The purpose of this blog is to give a few simple, practical ideas to help you grow closer to your girl.

Many girls are content to bond through simple conversation. My own daughters would be happy to just sit and talk, tell stories, sing songs, and would be happy as a clam. My son, however, would jump out of his skin if we tried to sit still longer than a couple of minutes. Now this is not to say that there aren’t any daughters out there that need to be engaged in some kind of activity. In fact, one of my nieces would probably jump out of her skin even faster than my son would if we tried to just sit and talk. She’s that active.

In my experience, a great way to grow close to your daughter is modeled on the tried but true tea party. Of course, depending on the age of your daughter you might not want to sit and have tea and cupcakes. You could get the same effect by going out for a slice of pizza, cup of coffee, or ice cream. (Whatever you go out for doesn’t matter as long as it’s her favorite.) Make sure your cell phone is turned off, and make sure there are no TV’s with THE BIG GAME playing over her shoulder. Sit across the table from her and make sure that she is the focus of your attention. Ask her about her favorite things. Let her direct the conversation from there.

Depending on the age of your girl, the conversation topics could be very diverse. The conversations I have with my four year old are mostly centered about My Little Pony or some combination of sparkly, purple, princess, fairy, or unicorn. (Purple fairies, sparkly unicorns, fairy princesses, or for the ultimate conversation we talk about the purple, sparkly, princess of the unicorn fairies.) My older daughter is eight, and most of our conversations right now are about her plans for Summer Camp with her friends. This is the first time that she’s going away. My baby’s going away to summer camp. (I’m sure there’s a future blog about that.) Older daughters might want to talk about fashion, cell phones, or GULP…boys. Just remember to let them direct the conversation.

Good luck, Dad.