When I was pregnant with my first baby I mulled over whether or not my baby would sleep in the same bed as my husband and I. I had heard several arguments for both. I went back and forth on the subject for the duration of my pregnancy. I was leaning more towards not co sleeping. I was petrified at the possibility of hurting my baby. The first night with my newborn son was short. He was born at two in the morning and we got to bed at five in the morning. We went to sleep with our son swaddled placed on a large pillow between my husband and I. He had not wanted to nurse much and even though I was tired I wanted to get my son to nurse. I got out of bed and nursed him in the rocking chair. He nursed a little and I went back to bed with my son sleeping with me. I wanted him to be with me I could not bear the thought of my five hour old son sleeping apart form me. I still wanted to get my son to sleep in his crib for at least part of the night. As it turns out my son not only ended up being a cluster feeder, but he also would not sleep alone. The moment I layed him down to sleep, swaddled or not, he would wake up. Even beyond his inability to sleep alone, was his need to fall asleep nursing. As a new mommy, I had not learned how to nurse laying down and nursing in the first few weeks was so painful that I could not fathom trying to get him latched on in bed laying down in the dark. I had to nurse him either sitting up in bed or in the rocking chair. He would fall asleep on my chest and I had to make sure that he was in a deep sleep before I could slide him off my chest. For many nights he just slept on my chest with a good part of my sleep taking place sitting up in the rocking chair. This went on for several long sleep deprived weeks. I discovered several things in those first few sleepless weeks. First, I was not going to roll over on my son no matter how tired I was, I had some how acquired the skill to sleep without moving much at all. Second, I realized that I preferred having my son with me because I liked knowing that he was okay.
(To be continued …)