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Dead Dog Walking

Today I failed as an animal lover and as an advocate of rescuing animals. I let a stray continue being a stray.

I did stop my car so the dog could cross the busy street. I was thankful I had caught it out of the corner of my eye in time so I could stop. I was thankful that the person in the car behind me had enough time to slam on their brakes and not hit me.

I marveled that the dog had made it across Nolensville Road at all. It’s a six lane road with a turning lane in the middle. It was approaching noon and traffic was heavy.

I marveled that so many people saw the dog and made an effort not to hit him.

I was headed north at the time. Once he crossed he headed south. I glanced reluctantly in my rearview, breathing a sigh of relief but hoping he continued staying on the sidewalk as he was doing at the time. Then I continued on to the post office.

I dropped off my letters and turned back around. As I waited to turn left at the light, here came the stray again. Apparently he had changed direction.

The car in front of me tried to call him to them. The dog contemplated them warily but quickly hustled across the road.

I rolled down my window and said, “Here boy.” A pathetic attempt to catch his attention.

His ears perked, but he did not stop or turn to look in my direction.

I held my breath as for one second I thought I was going to watch him venture back onto Nolensville Road, where this time he’d surely get pummeled. I cringed, not wanting to witness that, but instead, he again altered course and stopped at the gutter to get a drink.

Dead dog walking my inner voice bemoaned solemnly.

Because if a car didn’t do him in, who knows what was in that water? Antifreeze? Oil? He was right in front of a gas station after all. Who knows what all could have pooled in that gutter.

After his quick sip, he continued on. Luckily not smack into traffic. This time it was towards the strip mall next to the gas station. Still not ideal, and if he continued on his way he’d soon be at an even busier intersection. One where he’d surely need every angel imaginable to see him safely across.

The light changed and I had to turn. I had a line of cars to my right blocking me from darting over to try and chase down the dog, and there was a line of cars waiting impatiently behind me.

So I turned. My heart sunk, I felt the tears welling up in my eyes.

That dog’s going to die today.

Unless…

Unless I turned around and went to get him.

I debated with myself for two blocks.

“I need to get these errands done. I need to get home and start working. I wasn’t even supposed to come down this way today. It was a fluke I was even over here.” Maybe you were supposed to be here. Maybe it’s not such a fluke. Maybe you’re meant to do a good deed today. And are your errands and that work so important they can’t wait a bit longer?

So I pulled into the turning lane to turn back around. I’d seen a collar with tags on the dog’s neck. I had an extra leash in the back of the car. The animal control shelter was just down the road. I could see him to safety.

But then I hesitated.

What if it was like the dog Murph and I encountered a couple months back? The one who wouldn’t come to me when I called? The one who kept running? What if he ran from me and into the busy traffic? What if I was too late already? What if he’d already found his way to the even busier intersection at Nolensville Road and Harding? What if I got there only to find he’d already been hit? I’d be a wreck to come upon a sight like that.

So instead of turning around I continued on.

But then my heart sunk further. What a miserable, awful, failure of a person. I wept the entire way to my next destination.

I don’t know what happened to that dog. I hope some other soul was able to stop and rescue him successfully. I hope if that didn’t happen that he was able to cross any more streets he came to without harm.

But I know the likelihood of that is low. I know most likely he met his fate shortly after I saw him.

I might have been able to prevent it, but I didn’t even try.

Today I failed as an animal lover and as an advocate of rescuing animals. I watched a dead dog walking and didn’t do all I could to try and help him live.

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