Empty Nest Syndrome is a difficult time for any parent but for the single parent, it can be an exciting but also heartbreaking time. I remember when my daughter was 18. Just two weeks after her birthday, she decided to move out. Although my son was still at home at the age of 20 while attending a nearby university, I was devastated.
I remember thinking that she was so young and just not ready but she was legally an adult and it was her right. Although I tried to talk her out of going, she had her mind made up. I think I cried for weeks, wishing I could just holler across the hallway to say goodnight and I love you but that was no longer possible.
Making matters more difficult, she moved into a home with five people. Keep in mind, these were not bad people, but I could see trouble ahead. To my surprise, my daughter decided to move on after a few months, getting an apartment with a close friend. During her time from 18 to 20, she had to make a few mistakes on her own but I was thrilled they were not major.
Today, my daughter is 23 and doing amazingly well. I handled her moving but one year later when my son decided to spend his senior year on campus, I went through the same feelings although worse. Now, I had an even harder time with my son since he was the last one to leave. I remember the first month was especially difficult with the house being so quiet.
To be honest, it was time and a lot of phone calls and visits that kept me sane. As a single parent, I found the emotions hard to handle at times. I leaned on friends and fortunately, had kids who understand their mom was lonely. The kids have been gone now for several years and I’m actually doing great. In fact, when they come home and I’m left with dirty dishes in the sink, towels on the floor, and typically kid things, I smile but then think I’ve come accustomed to my own space.
The bottom line – there is life after the children leave. You have to make your own life, getting out to meet people, try new things, and do things I never did when the kids was home. It is different and at times lonely, but it does get better with time!
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