This morning on Today I happened to catch a segment about “Sex and the Married Mom.” I didn’t catch who conducted the poll. (I want to say it was a collaboration between AOL and Cookie Magazine. Somehow Cookie Magazine must have been involved because two women who worked for the magazine were being interviewed about the poll results.)
Who did it isn’t as important as the results they found.
The poll interviewed 30,000 married women about their sex lives. What they found was that most of us aren’t as satisfied as some may have formerly thought.
Some of the Results
• 53 percent admitted to having thought of cheating.
• 34 percent confessed to having cheated.
• 58 percent admitted they fantasize about men other than their husbands, such as co-workers, delivery men, and other women’s husbands.
Why Women Fantasize
As one of the Cookie Magazine women said, “Fantasies take us away from the stressors of daily life.”
And we have a lot of stress. Jobs are key. Be they in the home or out, we never really get “time off.” If you go to work and have a husband and kids, chances are you come home and have to cook, clean, pay bills, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. Your day doesn’t end when five o’clock rolls around.
If you’re a stay at home mom, you’re day never ends either and there’s rarely a break from the dishes, cooking, laundry, child care….
As they say, “All work and no play…” It’s true. The realities of marriage are not very glamorous. That’s where fantasies come in.
Go On, Indulge
Just as crushes are natural, one of the Cookie representatives suggested so are fantasies.
That’s right, fantasies are not bad –-unless you make them so.
So if you’ve ever fantasized and felt guilty, give yourself a break. You’re not bad, you’re not evil. If anything, you’re normal. (And fantasizing probably kept you that way.)
The only time fantasies become bad is when they turn to obsession or you pursue an object of your affection.