Ever wondered how people who are incarcerated get married? Do they have a ceremony? How do they get things like the marriage license? And what about guests or the reception. Do they have a reception? How many guests can attend a wedding behind bars?
I have to admit the logistics of getting wed from jail had never crossed my mind. But then that muse of mine, Jade Walker, sent me the link to a wild story about just such things. It was called “Marrying at Rikers Island: Few Frills, Many Rules” by Christine Hauser which was published by the New York Times on May 10, 2008.
Holy cow! A jailhouse wedding is not anything like a traditional wedding.
Traditional Wedding
Held wherever you want.
Flowers.
Photographers.
Cake.
Music.
Go home together, take a honeymoon.
As many (or as few) guests as you want and can afford.
Wedding dress center of attention.
Shotgun may be involved.
The ceremony could last for hours.
Jailhouse Wedding
Held behind locked doors in the jail’s chapel.
No flowers allowed.
No photography allowed.
No cake.
No music.
Jail cell for one, home alone for the other.
Only two guests allowed. (At least at Rikers. Might be more or less at other prisons.)
Wedding dress center of security inspection attention.
Shotgun as well as a few other types of guns guaranteed to be involved.
“I do” and it’s done.
Why Do It?
I don’t know. As Wayne likes to say when he sees a particularly oddly matched couple, “Must be love.” Must be.
Because except for the kiss after they’re pronounced man and wife, that’s all the affection they’ll get to show each other until parole day comes. (Rikers doesn’t allow conjugal visits. Some other prisons do, and if the prisoner gets moved to one they might be allowed a little nookie then.)
I guess it could also be seen as a mark of devotion. In some cases they had planned to wed and then one of them got busted for whatever landed them in Rikers.
Now that’s true love: In sickness and health, for richer or poorer, incarcerated or not….
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