My husband and I have to make some hard decisions very soon. We are going to ask a few questions of our in laws. We already asked it of my sister in law and she refuses to answer. The question is straight and to the point.
“Given the fact that we will not participate in a family Christmas get together again because of how the kids and us felt uncomfortable. Where do they see the relationship between our family and them?” It seems pretty straight forward I think but it will be a hard question. If they say that they will not be visiting with us except for the holidays and Christmas will be celebrated in February every year then we need to sit down and make the hard decisions.
The last time we spoke to my sister-in-law she was asked if she still wants a relationship with our family. She clearly said she only wants a relationship with my husband. So I guess this means me and the kids are out of it. Unfortunately she also is at risk of losing her brother as well. He will not have a relationship with someone who does not want his family involved. Not my choice but his. I have tried to get him to just go without us, but he says that it shows the kids a bad example. I do agree, but I still try to get him to visit with her.
We asked her the question above over a month ago, and she still has not answered. When we ask the mother and father-in-law, I am sure we will be put back in a time out, saying we are trying to stir up trouble as usual. The reality is we are trying just to see where we stand with all of them. If they only want to show up when someone is sick or birthdays than why bother?