Although the subject of Seminary seems to be a bit early for some, I know that in Georgia, school is started around the first week of August. So forgive me for intruding on our teens’ summer bliss, but I thought I’d share a few suggestions for getting ready for class.
While the responsibility for Seminary attendance ultimately comes down to the student, there are things that parents can do to help. There are also things that parents can do that will not help. Let me give a few suggestions on things that parents can do that can impede the Seminary process.
1. Force a child to attend Seminary. Although I only attended Seminary for three weeks (since I wasn’t baptized until about three weeks before I graduated high school), I quite easily remember a student whose mom forced her to attend. While the rest of us were in the classroom, she was asleep in the chapel. She didn’t help herself, but at least she didn’t impede the learning process for others. Other students might respond by acting out in class, which impacts others. I can understand the desire to want your child to attend. And there are some situations when a teen who is pressed to attend may find their attitudes changing. But we should come to those conclusions prayerfully.
2. Badger a child – especially a home-study student – to read their scriptures every day. When scripture reading becomes a punishment or a chore, the reader becomes less likely to absorb the principles, because they are less likely to have the greatest of all teachers – the Holy Spirit – with them. Recently, I spoke with some parents who said that their daughter was not attending Seminary this year because they had already had to force-feed it to their other two children. Because we are in a branch, we only meet once a week; the rest of the week, the kids are supposed to read their scriptures and write in their journals each day. The mom said that she was tired of forcing her kids to sit down on a daily basis and do the work, and so she just wasn’t doing it with the third, especially since she was already forcing the girl to do her Young Women’s Values. Needless to say, I’m not sure this is the best way to teach your kids the gospel.
3. Bribe a child to attend Seminary. As a parent, I’m not very big on bribery. I truly feel that, especially for spiritual things, we should teach our children to look inward for their reward, rather than outward. For instance, we should be teaching them to recognize and desire the feelings of the Holy Spirit when they attend church or read the scriptures. When we bribe a child, we teach them that what we want them to do is so bad, we have to offer an incentive just to get it done. I’ll admit that, with younger kids, there are times I just want to take the easy way out (you know, eat all your dinner and I’ll give you dessert! Be good and I’ll give you candy!), but I can honestly say that I have never done so with anything pertaining to the gospel. Of course, this reflects my parenting values, but I would seriously recommend against trying to bribe your youth into attending Seminary.
Let me share a quote I came across last night, while studying a CES talk. This was quoted by Elder Boyd K. Packer.
“Leaders invite, persuade, encourage, and recommend in a spirit of gentleness and meekness. Members respond freely as the Spirit guides. Only this kind of response has moral value. An act is moral only if it expresses the character and disposition of the person, that is, if it arises out of knowledge, faith, love, or religious intent. Fear and force have no place in the kingdom because they do not produce moral actions and are contrary to God’s gift of free agency [General Handbook of Instructions, 1963]” (Obedience, Brigham Young University Speeches of the Year [7 Dec. 1971], 1–2).” (emphasis added)
These are just a few ways to not help your children get ready for Seminary. Tomorrow, we’ll discuss methods of actually helping them.
Related Articles:
Early Morning Seminary: Keeping Up Attendance
Five Tips to Make Seminary Easier