My mother-in-law has a really impressive skill. She can whistle so loud, it can be heard above a cheering crowd at a wrestling tournament. (Just ask my husband; he was a wrestler.) But if you ask her how to do it, she can’t tell you. She knows how to do it because she figured it out by chance. As a kid, she just kept trying until it worked. Pushing a baby out during delivery is similar. You don’t really know how to push when you’re a first time mom, and you don’t know whether you’re doing it right until the baby starts moving down. The best way to learn is through trial and error because it’s something you just have to “feel” to do; it’s hard to explain it to someone who has never done it. But because there are people out there (like myself) who still want to know how ahead of time, I’ll do my best to describe the process.
First of all, you’ll need to know when it is time to push. This part is tricky if you have an epidural because you won’t feel the signals that tell you it’s almost time to push. You will need to rely on your doctor to let you know it is time based on your readings. During transition, as your body finishes dilating and gets ready to switch gears, the intensity of contractions reach their peak and you reach an emotional peak as well. This is the point when most women say, “I can’t do this anymore.” If you suddenly feel that you cannot go on, chances are you are about ready to push. Immediately following this stage you will begin to feel incredible pressure as the baby begins to move down the birth canal. Imagine what it would feel like to have a frozen turkey pulled from your rear. Yep. That is some serious pressure we’re talking about.
Once it it time to start pushing, you will begin to work with your pushing contractions to move the baby down. As the contraction comes on, you will feel the urge to push. Go with it. These contractions hurt, but what you will find is that the harder you push, the more relief you feel. This is nature’s way of making sure you work hard. Push through your bottom. It should feel like you are… pooping. As embarrassing as it is to think about, it is true. Push like you are having the largest bowel movement of your life. Put some power behind your push by temporarily holding your breath. Push for as long as you can, take a quick breath and push again. If you can hold your push while you take a breath, do it. Push as many times as you can during your contraction and then lay off once it is over. You might be able to get 2 or 3 really good 10-count pushes during one contraction. You’ll have a moment to catch your breath and rally before the next one comes.
Now, stay focused because this won’t be full speed ahead the whole time. When the baby crowns, you’ll have to slow down or even stop. The doctor will need to carefully guide the baby’s head through. You want a controlled exit, not a baby explosion. Because of this, your doctor will be giving you instructions on when to slow down or let up. You will need to listen carefully and follow his direction. You will want to keep pushing because it feels good, but you will have to suffer through a contraction or two while the baby’s head is born. After that, the baby typically slides out pretty easily and your body gets the message right away. Contractions come to a screeching halt once your little one is out.
On a final note, one thing to remember is that your body does do a lot of the work for you. In fact, if you were able to relax and not push (which is nearly impossible to do if you’re not drugged), you would find that you body pushes for you. The uterus squeezes the baby down with each contraction and it’s visible from the outside. You will see your belly scrunch up and slam downward – it’s a site to see! That is how women have given birth while they were unconscious. When the baby is ready to come out, nothing is going to get in her way!