How to Reach Compromises without Resentment

Let’s admit it; those of us who are married know how hard it can be to reach compromises at times. When both the husband and wife are strong-willed, reaching a decision can be tough. It used to be that the man was the head of the household and in some cases, he ruled by force. Though the man may still be head of your household, times have changed, giving women a voice in married life.

When it comes to reaching compromises without resentment, the key is to invest in a decision that benefits both people. Sometimes it’s true that one spouse may benefit more from a decision, but that’s just part of love. You can always agree that for the next compromise, the other spouse will get to benefit more.

As long as both people in a marriage remember to put their spouse first, there will be little room for selfishness and resentment. Here are some things to help you reach a compromise without resentment:

1. Keep the lines of communication open. This is paramount in making sure no bitterness or resentment is built up.
2. Talk about your feelings. If you feel slighted, hurt, or disappointed, don’t let it fester. Tell your spouse how you feel and why.
3. Try to be reasonable and see the discussion from your spouse’s perspective.
4. Ask yourself if it really matters all that much if you don’t get your way in a particular matter. Sometimes we take something trivial and make a bigger deal out of it than is necessary. Look at your situation and make sure you’re not doing just that.
5. Make sure you and your spouse consider the pros and cons of the various options available in reaching a compromise.
6. Once a decision is agreed upon, be sure to get your spouse’s honest feelings on the compromise reached. If any resentment or disappointment is felt, try to talk through it until both of you are comfortable with the choice made.

As you begin to more consciously take part in this rational process of reaching a compromise, you will see just how smoothly things will fall into place.